Page 9 of Fragile

“And he feeds off that weakness.”

I had attempted to point this out to my brother on numerous occasions but he wouldn’t listen. I knew there was a backbone in there somewhere, and one day, I would unearth it. Asher was my brother, my blood and had my protection, but I wouldn’t always be there and that thought worried me.

My mind swung to our father as I eyed the sad case in front of me. He so needed to grow a pair but what could you do? He was right, in respect of strength, we were opposites. I was a mountain. Asher barely had enough substance to make a molehill.

To a certain extent, my father and I were cut from the same cloth. I too exploited weakness and used it to my advantage, but not where my brother was concerned. Yes, he was a pussy when it came to our father, but I loved him and would do anything for him. Even take on Garrett Knight, which was no easy feat.

My father worked for some dangerous people. He was a powerhouse in his legal profession and deeply respected by criminals spawned from the harsher part of London’s underbelly. Garrett was a high-profile criminal lawyer; in a nutshell, he was the man who got the bad guys off. He had deep pockets and people from various crime syndicates took shelter in them.

His most valued Client was Gerard Kinlan, Head of the Kinlan Cartel out of Ireland. The Kinlan’s were one of the oldest organised crime families in the world and reached as far as Ireland, the UK, the USA and Spain. Supposedly, they now ran their businesses legitimately. Legitimate my arse; why the fuck did they need access to the best defence lawyer in Britain then? I raised my hand to the scar on my head, a token his son Kai had given me at school, the fucking nutter. Not that I hadn’t returned the favour, only my mark was less visible.

On autopilot, I appeared to be gradually rotating towards my father’s way of life. His plans for me were that I become his protégé, someone he could show off, and follow in his footsteps. Once he’d recognised that my brain was as sharp as his, he’d attempted to drag me under his wing and keep me there. I, however, had plans of my own.

Unfortunately for my brother, where Asher was concerned, the man didn’t give a shit. As long as his youngest son didn’t cause the family any headaches.

The Knights were well known in the city and if Asher were to come out, Garrett would see this as a disgrace to our name. He had strong, old-fashioned opinions; in a nutshell, he was a bigoted prick.

Did people really have a problem if you were gay, straight, or bi these days or if you wanted to identify yourself differently? I certainly didn’t. You get one chance at this shitty life, do it your way, be who you feel you’re supposed to be and fuck everyone else! I was many things but judgemental was not on my radar where shit like that was concerned. Fuck me, I was straight, but I had some fairly messed up preferences when it came to sex; some people may even see them as depraved. Nothing was off limits, and I had a high sex drive. Angry sex got me off the most, hard, and rough. As long as it was consensual, I didn’t go for the heavy stuff and physical abuse of women made me sick to my stomach.

Sexual appetites to one side, I certainly couldn’t be considered sane, bearing in mind I was the son of a sick, controlling fucker like Garrett Knight. But how could I escape it, my family had expectations and if I reneged on the deal, their focus would fall on Asher. And that wasn’t going to happen, ever. They’d have to kill me first.

To sum it up in one sentence. The Knights were involved in some pretty heavy shit with some rather nasty people. There was no way of prettying that up. It was what it was. Unsavoury at its best.

I redirected my thoughts back to my brother, who had just necked the rest of his drink. “What do you intend to do, carry on sneaking around and engage the services of fake girlfriends?” I said, my throat feeling constricted. I hated the fact that Asher felt he’d had to keep such a secret from me. I had mates that were gay for fucks sake. Did he think I would have reacted like Garrett?

When he said nothing, I answered for him. “So, you’re going to live a lie because of Garrett and his seriously out-of-date opinions?”

His fingers clutched the base of the chair, his knuckles turning white. “Why not, it’s a word most of our family are familiar with.” And he was right.

“So, what did you think of Leo—of Leonie?” Ash suddenly questioned, changing the subject, and, unfortunately waking my dick up. Great. She wasn’t even there, and that important part of my anatomy started to stand to attention. I readjusted myself in my jeans and then downed the rest of my beer. His version of her name didn’t suit her, she was way too feminine to be a Leo.

I thought back to that last lingering look she had given me, full of appreciation. The image of those thankful, innocent blue eyes were now carved into my memory. The girl had the power to get under my skin and that thought worried me. I couldn’t afford to get sidetracked; especially by someone so fucking sweet; the girl probably shat rainbows.

Yep, little Leonie Smith was lost and needed a saviour. I just hoped she didn’t think that man would be me.

Eyeballing my brother with a look that said it all, I pointed out, “I think it’s insane inviting a girl that looks like that to live with us. Do you know me at all?” What? I was being honest.

“I know you’d never touch her. You wouldn’t shit on your own doorstep. Besides, having Leonie here will be fun. You’ve been studying so much that I’ve been as bored as hell. Being ignored sucks dick big time.”

I bit off my ‘well, you’d know’ comeback and went with, “I haven’t been ignoring you, Asher, my finals are in two weeks. We can party once I’m done.”

“And thank God for that. You’ve been so tense and moody, that I’ve felt like I’m walking on eggshells. Leonie will add a chilled-out, floaty vibe to our crib.

“She’ll add more than that,” I said, partly to myself as I waded through my lust-induced haze.

“You know you could have been a bit more welcoming,” Asher suddenly grumbled.

“I thought I was being nice—for me,” I pointed out with a lip curl.

“You were a bit abrupt. She said you’d shown her the room though. Anyways, you’ll get used to her. She’ll feel like one of the family in no time.” The way Ash said the word family was like he thought we were part of some dodgy Mafia flick. The movies are full of shit, the real-life version was so much worse.

“Honestly, there’s nothing not to like,” Ash carried on, pushing to his feet and taking his glass over to the sink.

I know. That’s what worries me dickhead. I couldn’t get distracted by pussy no matter how appealing the package was, I had to concentrate on work.

I watched Ash’s broad back as his muscles shifted and he retrieved the bottle top I’d chucked in the sink. My thoughts darted back to Leonie and how she had offered to clean for us; the image of her on her hands and knees wasn’t doing my libido any favours.

Without further ado, Asher threw the bottle top into the bin, washed his glass, and then turned back towards me. His expression was now deadly serious.

---