Page 136 of Released from the Sin Bin

I’ve known him a long time, but he still surprises me with the shit he does.

“I had to pee, and the other one was too far away.” He tries to defend why pissing in a bush outside a fancy banquet for anyone to see when he’s a professional hockey player is a good idea.

“What’s going on? Why do you look sad?” Luca sets his phone up and folds his thick arms over his chest. “Did he screw it up already?”

“I screwed up.” I let out a groan. “I hurt him. He was all in, and I was too afraid to tell anyone. I’m so scared to jump into anything after Vic.”

I’m holding myself back, afraid to move on.

Luca is quiet while I sniff back my snot and try not to cry again. All I’ve been doing is crying, and it’s not helping.

“Did you tell him that?” Luca asks.

“No,” I sigh. “He won’t talk to me. I’ve tried.”

“Dick,” Luca mutters, but is quick to keep talking before I can defend Carter. “I didn’t kick his ass, because he had some nice things to say about you and I saw how happy you were. He knows what you went through with Vic.”

Carter knows more than anyone, but it doesn’t make what I put him through ok.

“He’s not a dick.”

“No,” Luca nods and chews on his tongue. “It’s a dick move not to talk to you, but maybe he needs time to cool down.”

“Ya think?”

“I know.” He gives me an encouraging smile. “If he’s as crazy about you as Kandace thinks he is, then he won't be able to stay away for long.”

“Kandi?” I question him.

“She told me all about him hanging out with you guys and watching the games. He has loving googly eyes for you or whatever.” Luca sighs and rolls his eyes. “I didn’t like it, but Kandace said you were happy.”

“Oh.” I smile and think about how Carter always finds me across the ice or comes to me during warmups. And how attentive he always is.

My talk with Luca helps me feel better. It’s only been one day, and Carter has always had a bad temper. I need to give him time, and will keep apologizing until he’s ready. Whenever that will be.

In the meantime, I’m getting this out to everyone that will listen. I’m in love with Carter.

My heart belongs to him, and his will come back to me.

I know he still loves me.

I get to the rink extra early to get my own practice in. Taking laps around the ice to clear my head and wake me up.

Every sound interrupted my sleep. I woke, searching for Carter several times, but he hasn’t so much as texted me back after the million I sent him.

The guys all file in, charging the air with their excitement at being in the championship. I catch each one coming in, hoping it’s Carter.

Lately, he’s been one of the first guys to come out, excited to see me. But one by one they file in and he doesn’t come.

“Where is he?” I ask under my breath while messing around with a puck, getting a feel for a stick in my hands again.

I wait.

And wait.

Someone comes running out of the tunnel leading to the locker room in their gear, and my heart stops. He’s here. Coach told us if Carter doesn’t show today, he doesn’t play after the conversation he had with him. And he made it in the brink of time.

But it’s not him.

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