Page 84 of Protected By the Billionaire Ex-SEAL

“Either you have a skewed view of things, considering you’re in love with him, or he’s really that awesome. Either way, I’m only going to ask this once.” She bites her lip. “Are you sure you’re not going to tell him? It’s not in the plan at all?”

I feel like I’ve had this conversation with Honey Lee and my parents already, and every time I do, it’s painful. But Sophia is just as important as them, maybe more, since we’ve always been close growing up together. Before she got busy in Europe, she always knew my greatest dreams and deepest, darkest secrets.

So, I try to be my most honest self with her.

“A part of me wants to tell him.”

She studies my expression. “But?”

“But that’s my selfish side talking. It wasn’t a relationship and it was better to leave on a good note…to have good memories of him than ugly fights about this. He let me go, Soph. If there was something deeper between us, wouldn’t he have fought for me?”

I’m right about this. Sophia knows it, too, as she reluctantly nods, accepting my words without any arguments.

“Well, it’s his loss, then. But you…” She sidles closer and wraps an arm around my shoulder. “You won’t miss the loss, sis, not when you have us by your side. I promise you that we’ll support you no matter what, and I swear that your baby is going to be so well-loved, especially by his or her auntie.”

They’re simple words, but they’re so heartfelt that I can’t stop my tears from falling. Sophia wipes them away, then finally pulls me into a hug. But I’m startled when I find wetness on my shoulder, too, and realize I’m not the only one being emotional.

“Why are you crying, too?”

As if the question is a trigger, Sophia cries harder, then laughs and shakes her head. Then she hugs me tighter.

“I’m just so happy for you. And I’m excited to be an aunt. I’m going to be the best one.”

I can tell it’s not just that, but she doesn’t seem ready to tell me. So, I let it go and try to lighten the mood.

“You might need to fight Honey Lee for that title. She claims she’s going to be the best aunt, too.”

My sister gasps dramatically. “Two best aunts? This kid is going to be spoiled to death.”

I giggle, which also makes her giggle. We end up talking about the things we can do around San Diego while I’m pregnant, and I can already tell I’m going to enjoy my time here more with my sister around.

“I’m tempted to say we can go out now, but you’re looking pretty tired and I think you need a nap.” She gives me a firm look. “And when I say nap, I mean closing your eyes and not spending so much time with these books. You’ve read enough. Now that I’m here, it’s time to live your life and proceed with your goals, okay? Just because you’re pregnant doesn’t mean we’re letting those go.”

“We?”

“Yes, we.” Sophia nods. “I’ll be your personal cheerleader from now on, sis.”

She tries to make me laugh again by going into a silly cheer routine, then finally leaves the room to unpack her stuff and give me time to rest. I glance at my books, then set them aside when I remember her words, but I don’t nap yet. Instead, I return to my words, particularly one statement that still stands out to me.

He let me go, Soph.

My heart squeezes, then pricks. The constant reminder that Christian accompanied me to Nashville until I got to my flight still hurts, especially because a part of me was expecting at least an invitation to extend my stay…

“Stop it, self. There’s no point rehashing it.”

I’m home. I have all the emotional support I need from the people I love, and not many people can say they’re that lucky. I’m financially stable and my health is great, so really, I’m more than ready to give this baby everything it needs and more.

I’m going to be a mom. I’m going to be the best mom there is, and that’s a promise that I’m ready to fulfill.

But what I didn’t tell my family, including my sister, is that I miss Christian to the depths of my soul, and it’s the kind of ache that I know will stay with me for a long time. My sister was right.

I was in love with him. I am in love with him.

And while forgetting him is the best step forward, there’s no denying that I feel miserable, heartbroken, and just a bit incomplete without him.

Chapter 27

Christian

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