Page 45 of Heart Match

This makes him chuckle.

He puts on his boxer briefs and jeans. By the front door he puts on his shoes and kisses me goodnight.

‘I’ll see you tomorrow,’ he says.

Then he’s running up the stairs to his flat, shirtless. I watch him as I wear his T-shirt impregnated with his smell. I go back to bed and fall asleep thinking of him.

Chapter Thirteen

I wake up at 5:00 am. My weekdays normally follow a set routine. I love having my days planned out. Structure not only organises my day but also helps me avoid unwanted surprises. In other words, it makes me feel in control. It looks like this:

5:00 am - wake up

5:05 am - get up and brush my teeth

5:15 am - pick sports clothes and get dressed

5:30 am - stretch before running for at least one hour. In good or bad weather, but not if hungover, which is almost never.

6:35 am - green smoothie for energy (hopefully it’s Andi’s day at Fresh Me Up)

7:00 am - shower, pick lingerie and clothes, dress

7:45 am - leave for work (Mondays and Thursdays are office days) or home office

- I will fit in lunch whenever if I find time, if not, then I’ll have a banana and cashew nuts at my desk.

- Work until my stomach starts complaining, which normally is about 6:30 pm

- Eat something I cooked

- Read a book in the balcony/couch or depending on the workload, work some more

- Sleep

- Start over

But today’s different. After my watch tells me it’s time to wake up, I don’t get up right away. I linger in bed, sniffing Luc’s T-shirt, which brings me memories of last night, which leads me to very imaginative and graphic thoughts.

I only manage to start stretching at 6:00 am and spend my time running looking to see if he’ll be running too. I don’t see him, and I’m disappointed. When did that start to happen?

I get my smoothie from Andi. Luc’s not at the café either. I resist the temptation to ask Andi if he’s seen him today. I don’t even need to, he shares the information anyways.

‘His brother came for his smoothie,’ he winks.

How the heck does he know who Luc’s brother is, and how in the world can he tell I was looking for Luc is beyond me. I’m glad for the unrequested information anyways. I nod at him and leave as fast as I can.

I get on the lift hoping to see him, nothing, which makes me realise we still haven’t exchanged phone numbers yet. When I’m finally ready to leave for work it’s already 8:00 am. I curse myself all the way to Secretive.

The point I’m trying to make by mentioning every detail of my routine is, now it’s been messed up for almost a week, ever since Luc appeared in my life. That’s what happens when you let people in, when you get too attached. Without noticing you start changing what you do and what you are, and by the time you realise, things are different, and you feel like you can’t control what you used to be able to, because your days now include another person.

The thing is that for the majority of people, this change is good. Not for me. It makes me anxious and fearful and insecure. It drives me insane. I hate changes.

I’m out on the street, and in front of the building there’s some kind of commotion, a black car is driving off while photographers and a bunch of girls are overly excited. Sometimes, stars appear in the neighbourhood, and together with them come the paparazzi and fans. I ignore it, as I always do, and make my way to work, taking the tube to central London.

By the time I’m at Piccadilly Circus it’s almost 9:00 am. Secretive’s head office is just a ten-minute walk from the Underground station. As I’m walking, I get the impression I’m being watched, something seems off. It’s strange, but it’s a familiar feeling, déjà vu most probably.

I try to remember when I last I felt this way, but I can’t. I keep walking, I cross a street discreetly looking around, my eyes searching for what, I don’t know, but there are dozens of people, maybe hundreds, minding their own lives. I turn a corner, I look back. Nothing. I only relax when I’m at my desk and Caleb and I go over our check list for today’s meeting with our team, then with Haley.

---