Page 36 of The Actor and His Secret

Oli hasn’t said a word since we left the supermarket. It’s like he’s been floating in a stasis state, unable to form words or even stop himself from shaking. I hate seeing him like this. If we weren’t in public, I would’ve punched the man - who was clearly an ex-boyfriend - for making Oli feel like this.

The man had looked like shit warmed up. Dark circles, the scent of alcohol tainting his breath. And whether Oli noticed it or not, there was the remnants of a faint white powder dusting his jacket.

Drugs. His dilated pupils as he was glaring at Oli proved my theory right.

I dig my hand into the bag and pull out the bottle of white wine. Luckily it’s a screw-top, so it’s easy to open. I take a quick drink to still the fury that’s etched itself into my bones, then offer the bottle to Oli.

‘Drink this,’ I say. ‘It will help.’

Without taking his eyes off the swan, he grabs the bottle and downs a quarter of it without breathing. A dribble of wine slips down his chin. I catch it with my thumb, sticking it into my mouth to suck clean.

‘Are you ready to talk about it?’ I ask.

‘There’s nothing to say.’

I shuffle closer, but not without pulling my baseball hat down and searching the area around us for any onlookers. Luckily, we’re alone. ‘That’s the biggest lie that I’ve ever heard, Oli. Clearly that man means something to you, to cause such a reaction.’

‘Geoff means nothing to me.’

‘Not anymore, maybe.’ I lay a hand on his knee and squeeze. If he looked down, he’d see my fingers trembling. ‘Come on, Honey. Talk to me. Off-load your worries on me. Let me help.’

Slowly, he turns and looks at me, dead in the eye. The severity of the emotion in his face knocks the breath from my lungs. The whites around his pupil are red, not from crying, but from stopping himself.

‘I was in a relationship with him for too many years.’ Oli admits what I’d already worked out, based on what the man had said and Oli’s Instagram. My first instinct is to walk back, find him, and pummel the man for ever hurting my Honey.

Then reality sets in and I know that this Geoff likely recognised me and was now walking around London with the story of how Nikos Ridge said Oliver Cane treats his cock and heart well.

Shit. I wasn’t thinking. I just saw Oli hurting and acted on instinct. But I can’t bring myself to regret it, not with how scared Oli had looked when the man started yelling.

Burying that worry down, I focus on what matters and that’s Honey. He needs consoling, and I’m not prepared to leave this park until he’s smiling that brilliant smile again.

‘And let me guess, you were too good for him, so it broke off and clearly he is suffering for it.’

Oli buries his face in his hand, the bottle of wine almost tipping over in the grass. ‘Actually, I came back from work early and found him fucking someone else in our bed. It… it broke my heart.’

Geoff had set the timeline when he mentioned Oli moving on in two months. So this breakup was fresh. Which meant the pain would be as furious as it had been the day Oli found his boyfriend in bed with another person.

‘He never deserved your heart,’ I say, the anger seeping into my tone. ‘It’s men like that who deserve to have their balls removed. Love should be coveted, protected. Geoff was never worthy of it. He wasn’t worthy of you either, Honey.’

‘How can you say that?’ The tears fall freely now. I want nothing more than to pull him into a hug and let the tears soak into my hoodie. But before I move, a couple walking a well-behaved Labrador stroll past. ‘You don’t even know me. We’re strangers. And in a matter of days you’ll leave me and my life will go back to the misery it was before you entered my orbit, whereas you get to go back to your big home, in your big city, with your big ambitions and big future - ’

Fuck if people see me.

I drag him into my side and wrap my arms around him. ‘You’re right. We’re strangers. So let me be the one to tell you that I’m well versed in love and its parameters. In fact, Selina - my manager - once sent me on a two-week intensive course of therapy. And I’ll never forget the first thing my therapist said to me, after I off-loaded my trauma onto her.’

I talk his face in my hands and make sure he’s looking at me and no one else. ‘We take out our hurt on those we care about the most.’

Old sniffles, the tip of his button nose red as a certain magical reindeer. ‘Is that supposed to make me feel like Geoff’s actions are justified? That fucking someone in our bed, in our home, was all because he cared about me?’

‘No,’ I say, brushing a strand of his blond hair out of his eye. ‘I was actually talking about how you just told me off and accused me of leaving you behind… as if that’s ever a possibility.’

Oli is shocked into silence. I see his mouth part - lips wet with wine and tears - and I want nothing more than to kiss them dry. ‘I’m sorry.’

‘Don’t you ever apologies to me, Honey. You don’t owe me that.’

‘Then why are you doing this?’

‘Because I like you,’ I reply. ‘I find you interesting, endearing, kind, thrilling, seductive. I could go on, but I fear if I make your head too big, you won’t be able to stand up right, so I’ll have to carry you back home.’

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