Page 66 of The Actor and His Secret

My eyes widen. I’m frozen to the spot.

‘But don’t worry. There are a few more photos I have…in fact, let me show you so you know I’m a man of my word.’ He fishes out his phone, clicks as few buttons and then holds up the screen to me.

I see the photo. Blink. And then empty my stomach across the floor. Vomit spills down my shirt, across my trousers and shoes. I can’t breathe or see as tears stream down my eyes.

The photo is of me and Oli naked in bed in his house.

‘Tomorrow you will be faced with the entire world asking questions about you. But it is nothing a little press tour and some damage control can’t solve. You have a good team around you - people you can rely on to fix all your issues. But if these photos…’ Father begins to swipe left, showing me just how many there are. ‘If these photos ever saw the light of day, say goodbye to your films, your promotions, commercials, sponsorships. But imagine what it would do to Oli. You can hide away in your luxury apartment, close the door and live a life you’ve always wanted. But Oli… what do you think will happen to him?’

I am imagining it. It would ruin him, being the subject of so much speculation and stalking and ire from fans.

My knees crack on the ground. My father watches, eyes now glaring down at me, reverting us back into the position of weak, pleading son and controlling father. ‘Please don’t do this.’

‘You know what is required of you.’

‘I’ll give you everything - just don’t involve Oli.’

‘He involved himself.’ Disgust passes over my father’s face, the very same I saw just before he pushed my mother down the stairs. ‘But you have the chance to save him. I’m not the monster you think I am.’

Aren’t you?

‘Take this as a warning, son. The next time you taunt me, the next time you test my charity and kindness, I will tell the world who Nikos Ridge really is. No matter how good the team around you is, I don’t imagine they can ‘damage control’ the news that Nikos Drakos was almost tried for murder. That is one fire you cannot put out.’

‘Why do you hate me?’ I’m crying now, a mess of blood and tears.

‘You tried to take my wife from me.’

‘I didn’t do that,’ I reply, numb to the core. ‘You did that when you hit her, beat her, treated her like shit.’

Father kneels before me, just shy of my puddle of vomit. ‘She was mine.’

‘That isn’t good enough of an answer.’

He reaches a hand and lays it on my cheek. His blood-slick fingers smudge across my face, the gesture fatherly but unwanted. ‘And you belong to me too. I think you’ve forgotten this over the years, but I am so glad we got to have this reminder. Ever since Oli came into your life, you’ve suddenly thought you had the power to refuse me. Let him be a lesson. Do as I say, give me what I need, and you can have the life you ran away from me for. Test me again, I will ruin everything. Do I make myself clear?’

My chest rises and falls with furious breaths. I lock eyes with him, wishing to grapple for control, but knowing the chance for that is long gone.

I drop my head and reply. ‘Yes, father. You do.’

He pats my head like a dog. ‘Good boy.’

Then he gets up, gathers himself, and leaves me more broken and alone than ever before.

25

OLI

Leaving Nikos behind in the car was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. He made it so much harder by calling after me in a broken voice. I shut the door behind me before he could plead with me to stay.

I know that I wouldn’t have been able to say no to him if he did. I would have said fuck it and waited for him to come in with me. I would have let this continue, because Nikos makes me weak.

But there’s no way that I can keep seeing him, not when I’m the whole reason that he might be outed, his career ruined, his life in shambles. I’m not worth any of that, not even close.

I know that Geoff is only doing this to hurt me, because he doesn’t actually care about Nikos. He’s doing it for the money, and for the chance to upset me. And good on him - he’s gotten both. He got a watch worth more than my annual paycheque, and I’m sitting here crying over the whole situation in the bath.

I’m very, very upset.

Unlike my usual routine when it comes to returning from travel, I’ve left my suitcase in the entryway. Normally I’d unpack it straight away, but I can’t bear to catch Nikos’ scent on my clothes. I don’t want any reminders of what I’ve lost. Even thinking about the selfies on my phone hurts so much I can’t breathe.

---