Page 64 of Twenty-Three Years of Longing

“Oh. Then what is on your mind?” she asked.

“My mother,” I said. “I...I want to know if she ever contacted you and you did not tell us.”

“Why are you asking about her now?” she questioned.

“Because if I am going to be a parent, I need to know that I am not anything like she was,” I stated.

She reached across the table and touched my hand. “Orion, your mother wasn’t a bad person. She was a damaged person. Life was cruel to her. Very cruel. Your grandfather and I couldn’t protect her. If you want to be angry at someone, then blame us, not her.”

I could never be angry at them. They gave us everything when she left. “But even now, all these years later, she never has contacted us. Why?” I asked.

“I believe the only way she knows how to survive is to close the chapter of her life that brought her such pain. And I am not saying that is you or your brother. But looking at you, brought back the memories, the nightmares. Don't hate her. Feel badly for her. And know that she knew that leaving you both with us was the only way to give you a chance at a normal, happy life. And I would like to think that is what you had,” she stated.

I needed to hear that. I didn’t want to take these questions into the next chapter of my life. Anything that was going to help me be a better father to Joey was what I needed to do. And letting go of the last bit of pain and anger at my mother, was it.

“It was a good life. Thank you, Grandmother. Thank you for always wanting us. And that is why I need to talk to you about living here.”

“You’re moving out?” she said. I swore I heard excitement in her tone.

“Yes, I am.”

“Wonderful. I can help you pack if you would like,” she grinned.

She enjoyed teasing me, but I wasn’t here to joke around. I just sat there and said, “There is more.”

“Do not tell me that Mayson is moving in. Please do not tell me that. I love him dearly, but he...he never stops talking,” she sighed.

Gets that from you.

“No, he’s not moving in.”

“Then what? Are you hiring some caregiver to come and boss me around? Because you know I won’t let strangers in my house,” she warned.

“I was thinking that we could pack your stuff too. Not all of it, but maybe several bags and personal things that you might need....”

“You’re sending me away!” she exclaimed.

“No. I’m taking you with me. Raya and I decided to live together, and we want you to live with us at my house,” I explained.

“Live together? What about marriage? I had the dream you know. I’m never wrong. You were married in my dream,” she said again and again.

“I know. But we are not ready for that.”

“But you’re ready to live together? I do not understand your generation. Marriage is a beautiful thing. And someone like Raya doesn’t come along more than once in a lifetime. Don’t let her go. Marry her,” she ordered.

I laughed. “Grandmother, I am going to. I even asked Joey for his blessing to propose to her. He said yes. But he also told me something else. He said that he wanted the wedding to take place on the anniversary of the day we met. He told me that Raya said it was a day she would never forget because it brought us together. So, we must wait another ten months to get married.” That day brought us together and our anniversary is going to be what makes us a family. On paper at least. In my heart, we were family already.

“Joey is a sweet boy. I love it when Raya brings him here with her. But he doesn’t let me win at cards. Not like you used to,” and smiled. “If Joey asked you to wait, then I will honor that request. But I do not know about living with you all. You don’t need an old lady intruding in your life,” she said.

“Yes, we do. And we also look forward to having a babysitter in the house,” I joked. No way we were leaving her in charge of Joey for an extended period, but maybe for an hour or so. Just not sure who would be watching who.

“And Raya wants this too?” she questioned.

“Her exact words were for me to bring your rocking chair and yarn because you both have some knitting to do.”

Grandmother smiled. “Then what are you doing sitting here when you have all that packing to do? Get going,” she ordered.

“Yes, ma’am.” I got up from the table and kissed her on the top of her head before leaving the room.

Many people would be running and hiding from a situation like this. But I considered myself the luckiest man alive. I had what I always dreamed of. A generational house filled with love.

And Joey will have a family, a family that loves him unconditionally.

The End

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