Page 42 of Psycho

“I miss you too, Mom.”

“I love you.”

Once I told her I love you back, I hung up, wanting to plop down on my bed and fast forward the next few days. While I was looking forward to spending some time with Will and Declan, I was not so much looking forward to spending it with Dean Briggs. Would he make me call him by his first name or something, since we weren’t at school? I didn’t even know what it was. Maybe just Mr. Briggs would be fine.

Ugh. I really didn’t know why I was worrying so much about this. It was stupid.

Travis was with Sawyer, and they’d already left to go to the Salvatore’s place. Both Sawyer and Travis had been quiet lately, and I really hoped it wasn’t because of my outburst the other day. Me, basically yelling at Sawyer with everyone else in the room. Me, telling Sawyer what was what. Yeah, it felt ridiculously good at the time—and so did the sex afterward with Travis—but the air between us after that had changed, gotten thicker, more tension-filled. Which was great, you know, me and tension. I loved it. Couldn’t get enough.

Declan was in the shower, taking a quick one before Will got here, picked us up, and then drove us to their house.

Their house. I was going to see where Will and Declan grew up. I couldn’t say why, but it was kind of exciting, like I was going to see an inner part of their lives. I’d be able to go into their bedrooms.

Silly, but I never had that kind of excitement before. With Ray, things were just…different. They were different. They were different, and everything that happened with him could never be repeated.

I shoved everything I needed in my backpack, taking a moment to appreciate my skateboard. It sat leaning against the drawers on my desk, and I felt the need to grab it and go skate. No more running, though. No more disappearing. My skateboard would have to wait just a bit longer.

I turned away from my stuff, moving to Declan’s half of the room. This place felt so strange now, after spending so much time in Sawyer’s house. I ran a hand along his desk, collecting some dust. Freaking dust, because we practically lived at Sawyer’s place instead of here now. It was more than obvious nowhere was safe for us.

My eyes scanned the desk, and I spotted something beneath all the papers scattered and shoved into the back corner of its desktop. I reached for it, still hearing the water running as my fingers grabbed it.

The diary. Sabrina’s diary. The one I’d found sitting in a drawer in Travis’s room.

I flipped it open, running my hand down the first page of writing, the letters swirly and girly. I’d read the entire journal as I sat in that McDonald’s, with my thumb dislocated. I read it all and thought, at the time, that Travis had done it. Why else would he have a journal of Sabrina’s? Why else would he keep it hidden away? The entries in this painted him in a bad light. She was afraid of him, of the darkness she knew lied within.

Me? I might’ve feared him, at one point, but only because I suspected he was like Ray. Now I knew better. They were both animals, but a different breed. Travis and Ray weren’t the same. Still, you’d have to be downright idiotic to not realize that at any given moment, men like that might turn on you. That’s kind of what made it half the fun.

Except fun wasn’t all Travis was. I cared for him a lot, and this diary…this diary said Sabrina had cared for him too, even if she feared him.

I recalled Declan’s words about it, when I’d shown him, given it to him. This diary was not the only one she had. Was the other one still in her house? Had the Salvatores changed her room or gotten rid of anything? Maybe that diary would help make clear the mystery as to what happened to her. If she was murdered, or if the girl truly did commit suicide.

I put the diary back where it was and grabbed my phone, texting Travis. Travis could do a little snooping while he was there, and if he found the other diary, great. If not, nothing was lost.

It was as I hit send that Declan emerged from the bathroom, steam coming off his wet, bare body. A towel was wrapped around his waist, hiding a certain part of him, along with his ass, as he gave me a sheepish, dimpled smile and said, “Forgot to bring in a change of clothes.”

As if he had to explain to me while he was walking out of the bathroom wearing nothing but a towel. Come on. This girl had two eyes, and she could appreciate the fine, lean body of her roommate. And, you know, her lover.

Whatever people called each other these days.

“Who needs a change of clothes?” I asked, shrugging. If his physical form was candy, I would’ve eaten him up. Declan’s body was lean and slim, but he carried himself well, and though his muscles were not nearly as pronounced as Sawyer’s, it was still a very lick-able body…even with the scar on his wrist.

I should ask him, should tell him what Ray had told me—that he wasn’t the one who cut him—which meant Declan had done it to himself, but I couldn’t. Things were finally good between us, and I didn’t want to ruin it.

What I wanted to do was forget what Ray said, but alas, that was impossible.

Declan turned to me, standing before his dresser. He wore a dimpled grin, and I felt myself heat up all over the place, just from that stupid, handsome, silly grin. God, Declan could drive me mad, and I’d still come back for more.

I moved towards him, pressing myself against him like a cat in heat, drawing a hand down his chest and his abdomen. I immediately saw a twitch of the towel, and I knew it didn’t take much from me to get him revved up. The road went both ways.

He responded by grabbing my face, tilting me up, and meeting his lips with mine. Soft and slow, Declan’s kisses were sweet and delicious. The way he kissed me, I knew he cared about me. No matter what the truth was, he was mine, and even if he was more broken than he let on, I didn’t care. He was mine and I would not let him go.

I wouldn’t let any of them go. No more running to Ray. This was where I belonged.

My fingers in his brown hair, I was content in our kiss—at least until there was a knock on the dorm door. Until Will’s voice spoke loudly, “It’s Will. You guys ready?”

We pulled away from each other, and I felt a slow smile grow on my lips. “Should I let him in?” A wordless dare to see what he said, but the stupid boy simply nodded and let me go.

What an idiot. We could’ve had a quickie while his brother was right outside. If that wasn’t hot, I didn’t know what was.

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