Page 112 of Pelvic Flaws

“You can stay,” I offered, hoping he would. “The kids will be fine about it.”

Dex leaned forward and kissed me softly. “As much as I’d love to, I can’t lay all this shit on you because I doubt I’ll sleep much tonight. Plus, I need to give my attorney a call first thing in the morning and run it past him. I need to know what I should expect. What I should do?”

“I think only you can make that choice, Dex.”

“I know, but I think legally I should know where I’m at.”

“Yes, you should. So, the cousin, I take it they know Savannah.”

Dex shrugged. “No idea. The guy just said they wanted to adopt her, but Lucy’s letter stated who I was and that she wanted S-Savannah to come to me. She wanted her to have a relationship with me.”

I smiled softly as Dex stumbled over his daughter’s name. It was all so alien to him. He’d reached the age of forty-six childless and suddenly, in the space of two months, got himself a girlfriend with three kids and found a long-lost one of his own.

“I just want what’s best for her, Katie,” he whispered, his voice breaking slightly. “And maybe that’s going to live with the cousin. And maybe it’s best for her if she never meets me. I mean, that’d mess with her head wouldn’t it – meeting me and then me handing her over to someone else.”

“I’m sure they’d handle it carefully,” I replied. “They probably wouldn’t tell her who you were, for that very reason.”

“You think?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know, but yes I’m sure they’d do something like that. I just think if you didn’t go and at least see her, you’d always be wondering.”

Dex nodded and then pulled me to him, this time him hugging me tightly.

“Thank you, Katie Cat,” he murmured into my hair. “I just don’t know how to deal with this, and you’ve really helped.”

“So you’re going to go?”

My heart thudded as I asked the question, for as much as I thought he should, I didn’t want him to. Something about him going ‘back home’, filled me with dread. It petrified me that I might be about to lose him.

“Yeah, I’m going to go,” Dex said, pulling back from me and running a hand through my hair. “I need to figure out what’s best for her.”

“You or the cousin?”

“Yeah, me or the cousin. Should she have a home here or Texas?”

My throat constricted.

What if he decided it was him and Texas?

“When will you go?” I asked, my voice sounding too small and too hesitant.

“As soon as I can, I guess. She’s in a real nice foster home apparently, but being in the system can’t be a good thing for any kid…shit, I can’t believe all this.” Pushing the heels of his hands against his eyes, Dex let out a groan. “Fuuucck. What the hell, is this a fucking dream?”

“No love, it isn’t,” I said soothingly. “You have a daughter, Dex.”

He looked up at me, his eyes wide as though I’d just shocked him with the news.

“Fuck, I have a daughter,” he repeated. “And I need to step up to the plate.”

“I think you do.”

I knew he would, he would do what was right, but I had a feeling doing what was right for Savannah wouldn’t be good for me – for us, and call me a selfish cow, but I’d only just found him and I wasn’t ready to let him go. I couldn’t, because finding Dex had meant I’d found myself too and if I lost him, I knew I’d end up hidden away forever.

Dex

“I’ll be back before you know it,” I whispered against Katie’s forehead, as she clung to me at the airport.

“You need to stay as long as necessary,” she sighed. “But I’m still going to miss you.”

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