Page 80 of Love in the Shadows

Fabienne kissed her cheek. “That sounds incredible. We are going upstairs to talk.”

Fabienne led Johanna to her bedroom and locked the door behind them. As she touched Johanna’s face, her hand trembled and she thought she might collapse from the exhaustion that she’d lived with for so long. But it wasn’t sleep she craved.

Johanna leaned forward and kissed her with such tenderness that Fabienne thought she might start to cry and never stop. With Johanna’s fingers gently massaging her scalp, cradling her head, her concerns slipped away. If only for this moment, she told herself. Had they not earned this time together? She wrapped her arms around Johanna’s slim waist, pulled her close and deepened the kiss. She tasted sweet, and the touch of her tongue ignited the flames of desire deep in Fabienne’s core.

Johanna undid Fabienne’s shirt and slipped her hand inside, then caressed her skin and her stomach, and undid her trousers. They fell to the floor, and Fabienne stepped out of them. She removed her shirt and underclothes and stood in front of Johanna, watching her closely as she scanned her naked body.

The lust in Johanna’s eyes urged Fabienne to satisfy their craving quickly, but she didn’t want that for them. Johanna wasn’t a secret liaison like the others had been. Fabienne’s hands trembled with the will it took to slow down and savour the moment.

Johanna touched her breast, stealing her breath, studied her with such intensity that Fabienne’s sex ached to feel her touch. She put her hand over Johanna’s, every gentle squeeze becoming electric inside her, and kissed her. The softness of Johanna’s lips, the searching caress of her tongue, and the tweaking at her nipple rocked her in waves of increasing intensity.

She eased out of the kiss and held Johanna’s gaze, gathering her breath. “You make me feel things I don’t want to feel,” she whispered.

Johanna caressed her cheek. “And is this such a bad thing?” Johanna kissed her nipple then sucked hard.

The shock of it, like an arrow piercing her heart. This feeling was a very bad thing. It was so bad it was good, and right, and perfect, and she didn’t want to not feel this way. To have to let Johanna go, that was her worst fear.

“Yes, very bad,” Fabienne said, her voice broken with emotion.

Johanna stared as if reading her, and smiled. “I get it. Bad is good,” she said, nodding.

Fabienne lifted Johanna’s dress over her head, unhooked the bra and slipped it from her shoulders. Her milky-white skin was soft and warm, and as she trailed her fingertip along the shape of her, Johanna gasped softly. She kissed along the line of Johanna’s shoulder and her neck, to her collar bone and down to her breast, then took her nipple into her mouth and sucked on it lightly until Johanna reacted with tiny spasms of pleasure.

Johanna held her head tightly against her breast, and Fabienne grazed her nipple with her teeth and flicked across it with her tongue. Johanna jolted, lifted Fabienne’s chin, and kissed her firmly on the lips.

“Bad enough?” Fabienne said, smiling as she traced the line of Johanna’s body to her hips and slipped her hand inside Johanna’s briefs.

Johanna gasped, leaned into her. “Nowhere near bad enough.”

Fabienne teased her clitoris and slid her fingers beneath her folds into the silky, warm wetness. She felt so good. Johanna bucked at her touch, and when Fabienne entered her, she held her breath.

Johanna’s gaze remained fixed on her as she shuddered and whispered moans. She bit down on her lip and tilted her head back as Fabienne made love to her. Her cheeks flushed and her eyes became as blue as the darkest sapphire.

“Very bad,” Johanna whispered.

Johanna clung to her, kissing her, as the shocks moved through her. Fabienne ached to feel Johanna inside her. She led her to the bed, and they climbed under the sheets. Johanna moved on top of her, and stared at her as if she might never see her again and wanted to remember every detail.

Fabienne felt struck by fear but held her gaze. She needed to know what that look meant. “Tell me your thoughts.”

Johanna swallowed and seemed to hesitate. “I’ve never had anyone do that to me.”

Fabienne traced the shape of her face with her fingertip, across her lips, watching the passion emerging in Johanna’s eyes again, and she couldn’t stop staring. “I have never wanted anyone as much as I want you,” she said.

Johanna smiled at her, and she melted inside. Whatever Johanna wanted, Fabienne would willingly give her. She lay back and closed her eyes, felt the briefest kiss at her lips and then at her breast, grazing her nipple and sending shock waves of desire through to her core. Johanna lowered herself down Fabienne’s body, kissing every part of her. She lowered her head between her legs, and Fabienne held her there, lifting her hips so she could slip her tongue inside her. Johanna licked her and gently massaged her clitoris until she could barely breathe.

It was all she could do to not cry out as the pulse grew within her, consumed her entirely. She was climbing, falling and climbing again, every gentle thrust of her tongue touching every part of her. If they stayed like this forever, she would still be left wanting. Then she felt Johanna’s fingers inside her, thrusting, gentle at first and then firmer. The sensation exploded within her, like a thousand stars, and then she was falling like snowflakes gently cascading.

“Oh, that was bad,” Fabienne said as her body stilled, and she started to laugh.

She tugged Johanna up the bed and kissed her with such passion that she feared the intensity of the love she felt. She stroked Johanna’s hair, hardly able to look at her, such was the pain that came with a love such as this. She tucked the loose strands behind Johanna’s ear, only for them to fall free again.

Johanna smiled. “Je t’aime, Fabienne Brun. Je ne te quitterai jamais, mon amour.”

She laughed. “You speak French and with a very good accent.”

Johanna smiled. “I learned it as a child.”

Fabienne wondered what else she didn’t know about Johanna. She felt delirious from the fear of losing her, but never more certain of one thing. “I am in love with you, Johanna, and no matter what happens, nothing can take that away.”

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