Page 66 of The Bodyguard

I was hoping to invite Gina for a drink before dinner with Nick to relax and chat as friends. To give her the opportunity outside our employee-employer relationship to chat freely.

I glance around as Briar pulls her bag over her shoulder. “She said she had plans. The rest of us are going to a show. I better get going so I can shower.” She glances at her phone screen. “Do you need me before eight in the morning?”

I shake my head.

“No.” Then I have a thought. “Is Gina flying home commercial with the rest of you tomorrow?”

Briar shakes her head.

Because I’m spending the rest of the day with friends in New York after the show in the morning, I asked Briar to fly everyone home to start their weekend early.

They don’t need to wait around for me.

I don’t know what made me ask, but I did. Now I have no idea how she is getting home.

“Oh, is she planning to flying home with us?”

Shit.

“Me, I mean.” I correct.

Not us.

Ryder and I are not an us.

“She didn’t say. When I asked, she got...um, annoyed with me.” Briar chews her lip.

“Okay. Go have fun tonight.” I force a smile and when she closes the door, I stare in the mirror. My smile fades and sadness washes over me.

I pick up my phone and there are no missed calls from my family. None. A tear falls down my face as I realize Gina hasn’t said congratulations to me about the nomination either.

Nothing.

Not one single word.

Jimmy made a big fuss about our nominations tonight on the show and it was fun, but it’s not the same. He’s paid to do it. Michelle, who sent me an enormous bouquet of flowers congratulating me, is also paid. She’s my manager.

Ditto the producers of the movie who sent a large cake.

These are my colleagues, not my family.

They understand how important this is and I’m grateful they are acknowledging it and celebrating it with me.

But I want one person who loves me to hug me and say, Girl, you did it. Oh, my fucking god.

Getting nominated for a Golden Globe is an honor and enormous achievement for an actor. This could be the only time it happens. Few ever get nominated. Even fewer win.

Listen, I can understand my family being so critical when I was younger. They are working-class people, so seeing their daughter being a dreamer rather than having a safe career must have seemed crazy to them.

I could have failed.

But I knew in my heart this was what I wanted to do. All I wanted to do. I had to back myself, even when I was told I was a fool.

How I found the belief and resilience I will never know. Perhaps if I’d still been trying at thirty-something, I might’ve given up, but that didn’t happen.

I didn’t just dream, I also took action. I took risks; I practiced my art and kept believing it was possible.

I did.

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