Page 7 of Fearless Sinner

She was the only person I contacted when I left L.A. She’s been my rock for months but I appreciated speaking to her more than ever last night as I cried about my mom.

“Hi,” I answer, pressing the phone closer to my ear.

“Hey, there. I’m just checking on you and your mom. Is she awake yet?”

“No.” I sigh and rest my head against the soft leather back of the car seat.

“Oh my. I’m so sorry this has happened. Try to hang in there.” April tries to sound her usual confident self, but I detect that she knows the situation is bad.

“I’m trying. I just wish I’d come home earlier. Even last week. Or yesterday.” I rest my hand on my head. “I was so silly. I was trying to stick it out at work until the end of the month.”

“You can’t think like that. You couldn’t have known that this was going to happen. It’s normal to plan things out until the end of the month. Especially a job.”

“I guess so.”

“How are you feeling otherwise? I know this news can’t be easy for you but please don’t lose sight of the work we’ve been accomplishing for the last few months. You’ll need that strength now more than ever.”

“You’re right.” I understand exactly what she means. There’s no way the person I was eight months ago would have gotten herself across the country so quickly. I was a mess because of what Nate did to me. And because I helped put him behind bars. “I guess I can say that I’m trying with that, too.”

“Good. Just remember to stay strong. And let’s hope your mom wakes up soon.”

“Yeah. Then I’ll have to face her.” My voice drops a notch. I was worried about seeing my mother again after so long, but I’d swap this situation with her wrath in a heartbeat.

“I think your mother will be touched that you’ve been by her side.”

“I hope so.”

“I know so.” She sounds certain, like she really does know, and I hold on to that.

“Thank you for saying that and for calling.”

“Of course. You know I’m here for you.”

“I know. And I appreciate you.”

April was allocated to me by my social worker after I provided the police with evidence against Nate to lock him away for life.

He murdered two people. And I saw it all happen. I was there at the convenience store with him.

He was high on the shit he’d been taking for months, and when the clerk didn’t give him the cigarettes he asked for, Nate killed him, and the man’s wife, too.I saw it all, and even though Nate had hit me several times during our relationship, on that night I truly saw him for the monster he was.

That was ten months ago. Before that, my relationship with Nate had completely gone south, and he held me hostage in our home for over a year where he beat me every day.

It took four months of intense therapy with April and her team for me to regain some semblance of myself and accept that in order to move forward, I had to go backwards. The answer to fix myself was to come home. Back to New York.

“Have you seen any other family members?” April asks, pulling me back from my thoughts.

“Not yet. The doctors called my cousin, Roxanne, but she’s out of town.” Roxanne works with Mom at Ricci’s, our family restaurant. “I think she’ll be around later or tomorrow. We don’t really have anybody else.”

“Are you looking forward to seeing Roxanne? You mention her a lot.”

Roxanne and I were best friends growing up. “I haven’t spoken to her in the same length of time that I’ve been gone, so I don’t know what kind of reception I’ll get when I see her.”

“Try not to worry about that. No matter what is going on, being back home is a good thing. It’s the fresh start you need.”

I nod even though she can’t see me. “I agree.”

“Good. I’ll check on you again tomorrow.”

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