Page 102 of Fearless Sinner

“I’ll double the security but we need to be extra careful. I don’t know why Lance killed Harlan other than maybe he’s passed his sell-by date. But I don’t know what that means. To be honest, it’s a wonder Harlan lasted so long.”

“Really?”

“Yes. He knew too much and saw too much. Men like Lance only use people like Harlan for a limited time. I was hoping to find Harlan first so he could identify Lance.”

“What about you? You’re not safe.”

He places his hand over mine and I look at our wedding rings. “Don’t worry about me.”

“Of course I worry about you. How am I supposed to not worry? You’re the Irish king. Aren’t you?”

“This is my life, Chloe. Danger. This is the place where monsters live and right now, I’m at war. People die in wars but I’m not going to let anything happen to you. My job is to keep you safe.”

“Then don’t you dare die on me.” A tear falls onto my hand and another follows. Before the rest come I pull him toward me for a hug and hold him as if I can protect him, too. “Stay alive, Cillian.”

“I’ll do my best.” He cups the back of my head and pulls me closer. We share another tender moment where my love for him deepens.

We stay like that for what feels like hours, just holding each other. It’s only when his men come by to speak to him that we pull apart.

Cillian leaves with them for a few moments then comes straight back to me, hardly wanting to leave my side.

The next day he accompanies me to the hospital. I spoke to Mom on the phone last night and told her about Harlan but I wanted to see her as early as I could today because I knew she’d be upset. She is.

Cillian came in briefly to see how she was, then he left us to talk.

Mom can move around now without a wheelchair, so she gets off the bed and walks over to the window. I join her and we sit opposite each other in the window bay.

“I don’t know how I’m supposed to feel.” She stares out the window, focusing on the ducks swimming in the pond in the garden. “We were married for two years and it didn’t start off badly. He left me to die. Now he’s dead. And I just feel numb.”

“I think that’s understandable, and it’s okay.”

She looks back at me and really stares deep into my eyes. “Harlan put us in this danger. The gravity of it really hit me last night. He put me, you and Roxanne in this danger, and he was never going to stick around to keep us safe.”

“No, he wasn’t.”

“I made such a huge mistake when I married him.”

“You’re not the only one who’s made mistakes.”

She brushes my cheek. “You’re young. People are allowed to make certain mistakes when they're young. I should have known better. There were so many times when I could have said no to him. I didn’t. Even the marriage. I married him after six months of dating. I never took the time to exercise the care most people show when they meet someone. Now look what’s happened. We need protection.”

“Please, try not to worry, Mom. Please. I know it’s all bad but the last thing you need is to stress yourself out when you’re recovering. You’re going home on Friday. Focus on that.”

She sighs and tries to look positive. “I’ll try but it’s hard when so much has happened. Thank God we have Cillian.”

“Yes. I don’t know what we would have done without him.”

“It’s his love for you.” She touches my cheek again and smiles, then she reaches for my wrist with the friendship bracelet she gave me from Dad. “I hoped you’d have someone to love you the way your father loved me, and you do.”

“Mom, we’re not even going to be married in a few months’ time.” I don’t want to build her hopes up.

“That doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you. That part is just a detail that the two of you need to figure out.”

“I guess so.”

Mom is right. And like a fool, I dare to hope that maybe Cillian and I can figure it out.

But I’m not sure if we can because Cillian already made up his mind from the start.

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