“Stop. Don’t say that to me. You love me, but you’ll still let me go.”
“Chloe, it’s better for you if you’re not with me. I couldn’t bear it if something happened to you. Look what’s going on now. We can hardly go anywhere without guards accompanying us. I don’t want you to live like that.”
Her breath catches and she looks more upset than she did moments ago. “You always knew who you were going to be. That you’d take over from your father. You told me you always knew. Yet you planned for forever with your ex. You would have always known what kind of life you’d lead, but you weren’t going to cut her loose.”
Her words slice through me. “Things changed.”
“When she died. They changed when she died because it was her you wanted to spend forever with. Not me.”
“That’s not true.”
“Yes, it is. And that’s okay. It’s fine. I would never want you to have to compare who you loved more, or whatever people do when they start over. But I don’t want to be around at the end of our arrangement to say goodbye to you.”
“What do you mean?”
“I don’t need to live with you. I don’t even need to be with you. I agreed to marry you, and I did. You don’t need me for anything else.”
“Chloe—”
“No, Cillian. Don’t. Just don’t. I don’t want to hear any more. Unless you can tell me you want forever with me, let me go.”
The words are on the tip of my tongue to speak. They’re right there, but as I stare at her, I imagine her dead and covered in blood with a message left on her body for me from some fucker like Lance.
It could still happen. It’s not like I have a handle on the situation with Lance, but I thought because she’s with me most of the time and heavily guarded, I could keep her safe. But now she wants to leave me.
She wants to go, and I can’t even lie to her to make her stay with me. She doesn’t deserve lies. The woman before me deserves to live her life in happiness. Especially after what her ex put her through.
“You deserve better. You deserve to be with someone safer than me.”
With tears in her eyes, she turns and walks away. This time, I don’t follow, but I motion to Liam to go with her.
She might fight with him and still try to take a taxi, but he’ll make sure she gets back safely in his car, or he’ll have me to deal with.
I watch them both go through the door, and even after they’re gone, I stay where I am.
Like the defeated conqueror, I think of what I lost. Chloe was everything to me.
People say that if you love someone, you have to know when to let them go, but they never tell you all the fucked up parts of such a choice.
The part where you feel like hell after.
The part where you feel like the world just ended.
The part where you feel like you know there will never be anyone else for you like the person you lost.
If this was the right thing to do, why does it feel so fucking wrong?
I didn’t go to sleep last night. When I Ieft the restaurant, I picked up where I left off with my investigation on Lance. Then I did every- and anything to keep myself from thinking about Chloe.
I figured that if I can get down to the bottom of the situation faster, it will put her and her family out of danger quicker.
I worked through the night going over everything I had with a fine-toothed comb.
I’ve had the feeling that I’ve been missing something since I recognized Lance’s voice on the surveillance recording.
By morning, all I had was just more knowledge of what I already had. Nothing new, just a few more ideas that were worth checking out.
Everyone we know in the Creed and our allies has been under investigation, but I sent my men to check out some other people I’d done business with in the last few months. People who might have known Harlan.