Page 202 of My Five Daddies

He narrows his eyes at me. “Studio has a lot ofmoney.”

“Sure they do, but we’re talking millions here. How confident are you guys in this film that you can do it without me at thispoint?”

He stares at me for a second before laughing. “I have to admit, you’re the real deal, JacksonHendricks.”

I grin at him but there’s nothing behind mysmile.

“Listen, here’s the truth. We don’t give a fuck about this movie. It’s just some summer blockbuster bullshit. It’ll make us some money and then we’ll move on.” He opens a drawer in his desk and takes a cigar out of a box. He clips it and lights it as he talks. “We don’t care about you either, Jackson. Sure, you can act and your story is pretty fucking cool, but you’re replaceable. Everyone is fucking replaceable. It’s when you start to think that you’re important that you get fucked up, youunderstand?”

He puffs on his cigar and leans back in hischair.

“I hear a lot of talk, but you’re not saying much,” I reply. “I want out of this fakerelationship.”

“I want my wife to let me fuck her up the ass, but we don’t always get what wewant.”

“Okay then. I’m fucking walking.” I stand up, fully prepared to followthrough.

I don’t need this job. I don’t need to be an actor. I can find something else to do if I have to. Sure, I get paid well, and being famous is pretty fun, but it’s not important to me. I’m ready to let it all go forTara.

“Hold on,” he says before I can turn away. “How about this. You can break up with Holly when filming isover.”

I raise an eyebrow. “Why not right fucking now? If we’re not doing promos as a couple, what’s thepoint?”

“It’ll look bad if you break up so fast,” he says. “There’s a difference between a relationship that doesn’t work out, say, and a fucking volatile one. People will think you’re both crazyactors.”

“Who cares?” I askhim.

“Trust me on this. We want the public to see you two as wholesome people that just didn’t work out, not as crazy actors that fucked for a bit before dumping each other in the middle of filming. That’s bad news for themovie.”

I hesitate for a second. “The second we wrap, I’m done. And no more publicappearances.”

“Fine,” he agrees. “Studio might leak some fake stories,though.”

“Whatever. But I’m not doing shit for this, and I’m dumping her very publically when it’s allover.”

“Fine.” He grins at me, puffing his cigar. “You really would walk, wouldn’tyou?”

“Absolutely,” I say to him, before turning and leaving his office. I show myself out of his house, get into my car, and head back to my hotelroom.

That’s not the solution I wanted, but it’s a good start. At least I can tell Tara that I did something. Mickey is going to be pissed but Mickey is always pissed. I’m still in the movie, he’ll still get hismoney.

I just hope this is enough to make Tara happy. I hope she can see that Holly means shit to me, that Tara iseverything.

20

Tara

At work the next day,I’moptimistic.

Sure, I slept with Jackson in his trailer. Well, really, I had an intense and almost angry fuck session with him, but that’s not the point. Holly was at least tolerable toward me for the rest of the day, and I’m starting to think that maybe things are turningaround.

Sure, I’m still confused as hell about Jackson, but whatever. I can figure that out one day down the line. I mean, I can sleep with him and not get emotionally invested, right? That’s totally possible. Absolutely. Definitely something I cando.

Except, of course it isn’t. I know myself. I’ve never been able to separate sex and emotions, but especially not when it comes to Jackson. I can’t even do it when we’re having sex. Yesterday I felt every single moment of anger and frustration come building up inside of me, even as the pleasure built up at the same rate. When I came, it was like releasing all of those emotions, flushing them away and getting rid of them. It was an incredibly emotional and a physical thing, all wrapped up intoone.

So of course I’m lying to myself when I think that I can just sleep with Jackson and nothing else. I know I’m getting sucked back into his bullshit, but I have to becareful.

He’s already complicated my life more than I want. Holly seems like she’s going to tolerate me, or at least she did yesterday, but that girl is dramatic and volatile. She can explode basically at any moment. And when she does, I’m afraid I’m going to be directly in hercrosshairs.

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