Dad came home the next day and the cycle had started all over again. Each of them screaming at the other and nobody listening at all. Neither of them seemed to even remember I was there, not that they ever had. My failing grades were the result of sleepless nights as they raged at each other and early mornings spent cleaning up all the broken glass and empty alcohol bottles they left behind in the wake of their stormy marriage.
I dropped the paper onto my desk and shoved my hands into my lap, so no one would see how much they were shaking. All the cheating and the drinking and fighting were nothing new, but it had definitely gotten worse. My parents’ relationship had been tumultuous for as long as I could remember, and I often wondered why they’d bothered to have me at all when they barely seemed to notice that I was alive.
I had plans for myself though. I’d already begun talking with a recruiter and I was set to join the Marines. Then, I’d be free of my parents’ constant fighting and blatant neglect. I’d finally be able to get out and see the world and have a life of my own. But I couldn’t do any of that if I wasn’t able to graduate in May and that wasn’t going to happen unless I was somehow able to pull my grades up. And that was going to take a miracle.
I flipped the test paper over on top of the desk and looked around the room, hoping no one had seen my humiliating score. Luckily, nobody was paying attention to me as they looked to the front of the room where Mr. Harding had begun a lecture on the Spanish-American War. I tried to listen, but my eyes traveled over to the same area of the room they went to every day at this time.
I’d had a crush on Christopher Brooks ever since I’d seen him standing in front of the podium as he gave his speech for class president. I’d known him my whole life, been in class with him over and over again since elementary school but had never really gotten to know him. He’d always been a smart kid, friendly with everyone, and very outgoing. The complete opposite of me. And yet, I’d felt something as I watched him standing there, not looking nervous at all as he addressed the entire student body.
Gone was the scrawny kid that I remembered from middle school with stick-figure legs and teeth that looked too big for his head. He’d been replaced by a young man with soft looking brown hair and the most mesmerizing pair of blue-green eyes I’d ever seen. He possessed an air of confidence that I could only hope to achieve one day, and I was in awe.
My infatuation with Christopher had only grown over the years as I watched him take on leadership roles in the school, starting our first ever gay-straight alliance club, serving as president of the honor society as well as class president and captain of the debate team. Christopher Brooks would go far in life. Everyone knew it, but it never changed how he treated others. It was only because he was so nice that I thought it might be possible to ask him for help and not have him laugh in my face.
The bell rang, and I took my time gathering my books and papers as I waited for the room to clear. When there was only the two of us left, I approached his desk where he was bent down, zipping up his backpack. He looked startled when he glanced up and saw me standing there.
“Hey,” I said. My voice cracked on the single word and I cleared my throat nervously.
“Hi! How are you?” He smiled up at me and my heart did a backflip.
“Um. Okay, I guess.” God, I’m so bad at this. My fingers gripped the strap of my backpack as it hung off one shoulder and I stared down at my feet. “So, I know we don’t know each other all that well, but I was wondering if I could ask a favor,” I said in a rush.
Thankfully, he’d understood my jumbled words, so I didn’t have to repeat them. It was taking everything I had not to turn and bolt out the door, but this was too important. I couldn’t stay there in that house, with my parents, for one more year. I had to pass this class so I could graduate.
“Sure. What’s up?” I took a step back as he stood up, but not before I caught a whiff of something amazing, like sunshine after a fresh rain. I glanced up at his face and saw him watching me with friendly patience.
“I uh…I’m not doing so hot in this class, or a couple others, to be honest, and I was wondering… ‘cause you’re so smart and all, if maybe you’d be willing to help me out?”
His eyes narrowed just a fraction, the movement so small that I probably wouldn’t have noticed if I hadn’t been staring back at him so closely. “Help how, exactly? Because I’m not going to write any papers for you or let you cheat.”
“Oh no! Nothing like that, I swear,” I hurried to explain. “I was wondering if you might tutor me. You know, if you don’t mind and only if you have time for it. I know you’re really busy with all of your clubs and your friends—”
“I’d be happy to,” Christopher said, cutting off my incessant rambling.
“You would?”
He laughed at my obvious surprise. “Of course. When would you like to start? We could go to my house if you want. My parents don’t usually get home from work until seven o’clock, so it’ll be quiet while we work, or we could go to your house, if you’d rather.”
“Definitely not my house. It’s never quiet there,” I said. There was no way I would ever take him home with me. Christopher Brooks didn’t belong in a place like that.
“Okay, mine then. I have an honor society meeting today after school, but we could start tomorrow, if you want.”
“Yeah, tomorrow would be great,” I said with a grin. I probably sounded like an idiot, but I couldn’t help it. I finally felt like maybe things could start to turn around, and I was going to get to spend some time with the boy I’d been crushing on for the better part of three years.
My smile slipped from my face as something occurred to me that I hadn’t thought about before. “Um, I guess I should find out first how much you charge. I don’t have much money so that may be a problem.”
Christopher tilted his head to the side as he considered that. “How about we make a deal instead? I’ll help you get your grades up enough to pass, and in return, you go with me every Saturday to serve meals at the soup kitchen,” he said, pushing his hand out for me to shake on it.
I didn’t even have to think about it. “Deal,” I told him. We smiled at each other and my heart thudded loudly as my hand slipped into his.
I ran my hands over my face, groaning softly as the memories slipped away from me. I was exhausted from the emotional rollercoaster seeing Topher again had put me through, so I rolled over, letting sleep take me. But as hard as I tried, I couldn’t stop the spark of anticipation I felt over seeing him again the next day.