Page 55 of Provoking the Punter

“That’s the conclusion I was reaching. I was hoping you’d tell me I was wrong.” Because he didn’t want to be a part of the coming out drama, even though he was enjoying sneaking around. No, not sneaking around, the keeping it to themselves. It was theirs, and it was special, and when they were together, nothing else mattered. There was no one else to please.

They both spent the rest of their days pleasing other people: Garrett trying to gain the approval of his coaches and team mates, and him making sure people enjoyed coming to his establishments.

He should’ve been a dentist, then people would be terrified to see him.

“That’s usually how it feels when you find the right person.”

“It feels so right it’s got to be wrong?” That made no sense at all.

“More that you didn’t see it coming, and that you were in a good place. Maybe it’s easier to fall in love when you don’t want it or need it.” Preston grabbed his towel. “As much as I’d like to stay here all day and dissect your problem, some of us actually have to open the office and see patients at nine.”

“Excuse me, I have to go to work.” Chester hoisted himself out of the pool.

“Please, you don’t open for lunch on Wednesdays.” Preston wrapped his towel around himself.

“No, but there is a team-building gin-making class coming in at two, a repairman coming to fix a toilet, I need to order in some more stock, and I have to discuss the seasonal menu changes with the chef.”

“And all I have is a couple of tooth extractions and some fillings. Some days, I wonder why I became a dentist.”

“The money?” Chester deadpanned. It was a more stable job than running a bar or a restaurant.

“Because my father said he’d pay for college so I could take over the business.”

That should’ve been him taking over the family business. The third generation of moonshiners. He couldn’t imagine working alongside his father, living in that a glorified shed. Perhaps if his father had run a reputable business, things would’ve been different.

“So, what do I do about him?”

Preston stared at him as though the solution were obvious. “You keep doing him?”

“That’s not a solution.” That was a wait-and-see what happens. And that wasn’t a plan. He liked a plan because then he knew where he was going. Which is exactly what he’d thought with Michael. Michael had slotted into his plan. And then he had torn a hole in it by exiting the relationship using moving to another state as an excuse.

Preston swept his hair back, flicking water everywhere. “If you’re both having fun, what does it matter?”

Because it would stop being fun at some point. Someone would get hurt.

Michael leaving had hurt, but it hadn’t ripped out his heart and put it on public display.

“Or you find someone nice and sensible who will bore you to death,” Preston finished.

“Or I could be single.” He didn’t need someone to be happy, and it had taken him thirty years to realize that.

“So, if you’re happy being single, why are you worried about it ending?”

Chester didn’t have an answer for that because it shouldn’t matter.

Preston put a hand on Chester’s shoulder. “Have you tried telling him how you feel and that you have massive abandonment issues?”

He glared at Preston, then turned and walked towards the locker rooms. “I do not.”

“Please… Would you like me to list the reasons?”

“No… I’m pretty sure my therapist covered that when we talked about my mother leaving.” And he’d told her much the same thing. It didn’t bother him. She’d done what she needed to, but there was a part of him which always wondered why she hadn’t taken him. Why she had left him to crawl out on his own, even though logically he understood.

“So you’ve fallen for the closeted guy who travels for work, and is some kind of celebrity. You know this ends only one of three ways, right?”

“And what are they?” He was struggling to see past the end, even though he wanted more, because he didn’t know what more looked like.

“You’ll either make it work and be a ridiculously happy power couple, which is what you secretly want, because you’d love someone who is as dedicated to their career as you, or he will destroy you.”

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