Page 26 of Ruled By Their Desires

Four

It had seemed like forever since she’d been in her room.

Nothing had changed, all her favourite things were still there. Walking around she touched them here and there remembering where she’d got them and why. The places they’d been, the people they’d met, the missions she’d been on. The destruction and loss they’d encountered. Her life since meeting the quad was in this room.

She no longer lived near her parents, but she wasn’t near the main barracks either. This place had been a compromise. At first it was because she didn’t want to be too near her parents and to keep from bumping into Marcus after they’d relocated into the base ten years ago. Everything she did in the base was in direct contrast to him. Different PT to him, different meals, different meetings, different missions and different training. Her orders came from her father, not from Marcus.

They hadn’t even bothered asking her about it, just set it all up like that and it worked for her.

She remembered having one of her famous fits when she’d first seen it, wanting to be with everyone else but as time passed, she knew they’d been right and was glad to be where she was, not wanting to see her uncles ‘relaxing’ or deal with the aftermath of a session with one of their women was a bonus. She’d seen enough of that in their own camp. But to be fair, they were not unkind to their ladies, in fact they were very generous by all accounts. No one complained about being with them other than wanting more.

And that was the problem, the women tended to hope for more and it never was. It wasn’t like they weren’t honest with the women, they were, but she’d been cornered more than once by a crying woman on her shoulder. And when they couldn’t find them and saw her, they’d ask her to plead their cases.

She now wondered if she was the cause of that behaviour.

Had they limited their lives for their pact?

Yeah, she didn’t need to see that too often, but she didn’t know and maybe it was time she had that conversation with them. They couldn’t be putting their lives on hold for her. Not any longer. It wasn’t fair to them, not now she knew they could have more.

Languishing in the shower she tried not to think about what had just happened. That sick feeling in the pit of her stomach wouldn’t leave her. To stop her brain working she focused on getting out, drying her hair, changing into a vest and shorts, and debated if she should go for food or not. But, knowing her mother would be there, she wasn’t up for that reunion just yet, she’d rather starve. A knock and her door opened. Comet walked in with a tray. She grinned. “Do you know how much I love you?”

He smirked. “Yeah, but you’re loving the food more right now, right?”

“Damn straight. Gimmy.”

He chuckled placing it over her lap as she sat in one of two chairs in the room. It had once been a large store cupboard converted for her. He sat in the other in silence while she ate suddenly starving. Only when she’d finished and drinking coffee did she really look at him. He looked tired, practically asleep in the chair. She remembered Hawks words about not being able to carry her out.

“You did good Moon. The recon, the retreat. We got it done because of you and got out because of you too. We all know that. Several SCs owe you their lives. If not all of us.”

She gave a nod in recognition of the praise. “How bad?”

“I need a recharge. I’ll be good after that.”

“The others?”

“Same.

That meant they’d taken injuries and expelled the bullets on the way here. And not said a god damn thing or taken proper rest. They’d be talking about that tomorrow. It was a drain on their systems, and they’d need to shut down for a while. Getting up she used the bathroom and cleaned her teeth before going to him silently removing his boots and socks and helping him off with his jacket and shirt pulling him up. Well, him letting her pull him up. He had several patches on his torso. She ignored the reprimand clawing at her to give him.

“Bed. Now. Don’t argue.” They both knew he wasn’t going to. Crawling in, she felt his weight behind her as he laid down on his back and snuggled in. He couldn’t hold her. If he was shutting down, he couldn’t displace the weight of his arm and it would crush her. They’d explained all about themselves a long time ago. So she did the next best thing for both of them. She climbed over him, pulling the blanket over them holding him. Her chest, head and shoulders laid over his body, her arm across his chest and closed her eyes, grateful to still have them safe. “We’re going to talk about you all needing to recharge and not telling me but for now, I’m just glad you’re here and safe. Sleep.”

She felt him grin as she patted him. “Thank you little bit,” he sighed. They both heard the door open but didn’t stir. If they were needed, they’d say. It closed again and she slept. They both did.

When she woke Comet was gone. It wasn’t unexpected. They never slept for long. Her eyes sore, she checked the clock, it was early, but she knew her father would already be at his desk. She’d always avoided going there unless it was the time allocated to her when Marcus wouldn’t be there. Normally she’d see both her parents in their quarters, but she needed to debrief and see him. Out of bed she headed to the bathroom to clean up and was out in clean clothing making her way to see him. Her stomach rumbling. She was starving. Missions always did that to her. It was like she was drained of nutrients or something and had to re-stock or some shit. Just like her uncles. It was weird but it was her. Finding his door ajar, was a clear indication he was in.

She knocked striding in, going to him. “Morning pops,” she hugged his shoulders and gave him a kiss on the forehead lingering a little before going to the coffee pot and pouring a drink. “I’m glad to be home.”

“You good?” he asked. She gave a nod showing him the pot, but he declined, and she took a seat in front of his desk.

“Better with this. Thank god for coffee beans. The others debrief already?”

“Last night.”

She got her ducks in a row and started talking. Told him everything from start to finish apart from the incident at the lake as she drank. She knew he wouldn’t be happy about how she’d put herself at risk but also knew it was her job.

He leant towards her. “The mission was a success as I’m sure you guessed, in large part to you. Still putting your ass out there to get shot off I see.” He gave her a pained look, then looked resigned. Proud even. “But the intel you retrieved was invaluable to the mission’s success and the defensive line you took got them all back safely. They all acknowledged that. However, the intel also told us they’re looking for more silo’s so this isn’t over.”

She nodded. She guessed as much by the conversations she’d overheard in the silo compound. “I thought they’d all been disarmed?” He gave an I don’t know shrug. “You got other teams on that?” He gave her a tired nod. “Good. I’m happy to help where I can but I’m not staying in here full time.” She told him ripping the band aid off. “This place, it was always too claustrophobic for me. Now more than ever. I can only be here doing what works for me. I need to get back to my old life. Train with the quad, then rotate out doing recon and security around the base a week at a time and go on missions. I’d prefer it if we picked up where I left off.” He nodded knowing better than to argue.

---