Page 32 of Recklessly, Wildly Yours

“No...maybe. I don’t know.” I madly keep my eyes on my phone, tapping, swiping, scrolling.

He stops the car in the middle of the parking lot exit. “Miller. What’s going on in that pretty head of yours?”

I glance up and look in the rearview mirror. “You can’t just stop here. There are cars behind us.”

“I don’t give a shit about those cars, Maddie. I give a shit about why you’re being weird with me. What gives?”

I’ve only dated three guys in my life. I didn’t have a boyfriend in high school and didn’t lose my virginity until I was twenty. I’ve never had a one-night stand. I’ve never kissed a random stranger before I kissed Ethan. All up, I don’t have a lot of experience with men or flirting. And I have no experience with the kinds of feelings I’m having right now.

I look at Ethan who is watching me like I’m the only other person in the world. He’s giving me the kind of attention I’ve never known, and he’s right; I am being weird with him. All I can give him is my truth. “I’m thinking about how much I liked shopping with you. No one’s ever gone shopping with me and made it fun like you did.” I pause before adding, “I really like hanging out with you.”

Surprise is clear in his eyes. I don’t think he expected that. “I really fucking like the way you share yourself so honestly.”

A horn blares from behind us while my heart beats loudly in my chest.

“I was also thinking about our kiss the other day.”

His piercing gaze smolders with an intensity that jolts electricity through my veins. “I haven’t been able to get that kiss out of my mind.”

My breathing feels very unsteady right now.

The horn blares again.

“We need to go,” I say, even though leaving this moment behind is the last thing I want to do.

“Yeah.” Ethan’s voice is gravel, and it moves into my veins, too.

He doesn’t stop looking at me.

The horn blares again, for much longer.

I smile. “You’ve got a photo to take of me, Black.”

He’s still not taking his eyes off me. “Will there be a middle finger involved?”

“I’m not sure yet. Let’s see.”

13

Ethan

Maddie’s brain and body are in competition over allowing her to just be herself in front of my camera. She’s the most beautiful woman I’ve had in front of my camera, and it’s clear she’s used to being photographed, but I’m looking for something more than just her beauty to show up in these photos. I want to see her essence and the only way we’ll get that is if she discards her perfectly choreographed mannerisms and lets her soul do the talking.

We drove to the Pittsburgh Botanic Gardens to take these photos and the setting is gorgeous with the picturesque fall foliage as our backdrop. Maddie removed her wig, so we found a secluded space amongst trees that offered privacy, and we’ve spent the past fifteen minutes trying to get some good shots, but I haven’t been happy with any of them.

“Is that one better?” she asks as I inspect the photo I just took.

It’s a perfectly fine photo that a lot of photographers would be happy with. However, it doesn’t even begin to capture the Maddie I’m getting to know.

“We can do better.”

She frowns. “Really? I thought that one would have been good.” She walks my way. “Show me.” After I let her look, she says, “Seriously, Ethan, what’s wrong with it?”

“Everything.”

More frowning. “Well, that’s cleared things up for me.”

“I want to see you in the photo, Maddie. I’m not seeing that.”

---