Page 48 of Recklessly, Wildly Yours

He gives me a smoldering look as he reaches down to bring my leg over his body. “I’ll take sexy.”

“What about the nerd bit?”

He rests his hand on my thigh. “Yeah, that too. I read a lot of shit.”

“What do your other tattoos mean?”

He raises his arm that’s around my shoulder and shows me his inner forearm where four simple symbols are inked in a line. “This represents the idea of letting chaos in if you want change.”

“And the one on your chest?”

“That one wasn’t my best decision in life.”

Color me intrigued. I push up onto my side and look down at him, noting the grimace on his face. “Okay, so now you definitely have to tell me about it.”

Still looking slightly pained, he says, “I was barely nineteen when I got that one. I was trying to impress a girl, which in hindsight was a waste of my effort because she was the one who cheated on me.”

“What does it mean?” It’s a beautiful tattoo but he’s giving me the impression he’s not a fan of it.

“It’s the Sanskrit symbol for breathe.”

“You say that like you don’t like it.”

“It’s not something I would choose to get, but I was young and dumb. Lyra wanted matching tattoos and I couldn’t have jumped any higher or faster to do what she wanted.”

I study the tattoo again. “I think it’s lovely.”

“It’s a reminder for me now.”

“To breathe?” I try not to smirk.

“Smart-ass.” He grins. “No, it reminds me not to jump so fucking fast all the time.”

I lightly run my finger along his jaw. “I don’t know, Ethan, you do seem to like inviting chaos in. If you weren’t as spontaneous as you are, I wonder if you’d be bored in life. I, for one, am glad you are because otherwise, I would have missed out on our conversations, which are helping me make changes in my life.” I push up to sit cross-legged on the bed and add softly, “Before we left for dinner tonight, I posted that photo you took of me, along with a post about my relationship and abortion.”

I’ve got all his attention now. “How are you feeling about that?”

“It’s a little scary, but I went with my gut and stopped letting fear make the rules. I’m not sitting in my mess anymore, and that feels good.”

“Fuck, Maddie,” he curses with a look of regret, sitting up with me. “I was just trying to force your anger out when I said that to you. I—”

I place my finger to his lips, silencing him. “No, you were right. I was scared to deal with all of this, but if I just keep piling more lies and half-truths on top of what’s already out there, nothing changes. And I desperately want things to change.”

His studies me silently and I see his mind working. “That’s a brave fucking thing to do.”

“It might also have been a dumb thing to do, but I can’t take it back now.” I smile, remembering what he said to me earlier. “My head can play catch up and figure it all out later, though, right?”

“It absolutely can,” he says before reaching his arm around my waist and pulling me onto his lap. “You’re capable of anything, Miller. Don’t ever forget that.”

My breath hitches at the way Ethan’s looking at me, like he’s captivated by me. And at what he says. No one has ever said anything like that to me.

He slides his hand along my jaw and into my hair. “You believe that, right?”

“Yes, but I’ve never felt like anyone else believed it.”

He scowls at my admission. “You’re spending time with the wrong people then.”

“Yeah, I have been.” I bring my arms up and loop them around his neck. “But now I’m spending time with the right person and I’m hoping he might be up for another orgasm.”

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