Page 16 of Snared Rider

“Get Beth inside; we’ll make sure they leave,” Jeff mutters, straightening his kutte before he steps through the gate.

Tap pauses at my side and lowers his head as his hands drop to his hips. When his eyes raise to mine I see his disappointment. “You should’ve told me she was here, little one.”

Guilt washes through me with a side helping of shame. I should have told him. I should have told anyone rather than rushing out here. I’d been stupid, but I hadn’t expected her to bring Tal. In hindsight, I should have; Gina rarely comes alone.

“Gina’s my problem,” I tell him, “not yours.”

“Wrong,” Tap contradicts. “Gina is Jack’s problem and you let Jack handle it from now on, understand?”

I nod, even though I don’t agree. She’s my mother and it’s me she comes to see, not Jack. This makes her my problem. But I know better than to argue with Tap; it’s an argument I won’t win.

“Sorry,” I mutter.

Tap shakes his head and moves around me to follow Jeff.

“Inside now, little one.”

Taking that as his cue, Logan gives me a firm pull to get me moving and I do so willingly.

I don’t see what happens to Gina and Tal because I’m pulled deeper into the compound out of view of the gate, but I hear her shrill yell and I cringe. This is precisely why I didn’t tell Tap she was here; now he’s cleaning up my mess.

When I was younger I used to wonder what it would be like to have a normal mother. I hate what she is, I hate that she’s so weak she let drugs and booze rule her life, but most of all I hate that I feel hate. I shouldn’t despise her or feel disgusted by her, but I do, and that leaves me hollow inside. A daughter shouldn’t wish her mother would disappear, but I wish it every time I see her because life would be easier if she were gone.

Logan leads me back into the building and I didn’t realise I was chilled until the warm air settles over me, leaving me shivery. He doesn’t speak as he guides me into the common room, and that makes my anxiety grow. I’m not scared of Logan, but I’m not in the mood for a lecture, and that is undoubtedly what I will get. As the eldest Harlow sibling, Logan’s no stranger to keeping teenagers in check. After the accident that killed his dad (and left Logan in the hospital for a month), he stepped into that role as patriarch of the Harlow clan, and it’s a role he undertakes well. This means he gives bloody good lectures, if Jem is to be believed.

The bar is empty now Tap is no longer sat at the counter. The remnants of my homework is still scattered on the top and Tap’s half-empty pint sits abandoned, as if he just got up and walked away.

I don’t look at Logan as he orders me to sit on the nearest stool. I can feel the anger rolling off him and while I don’t think it is directed at me, I’m not stupid enough to find out.

“Are you hurt?” he demands.

I stare at my hands folded in my lap and shrug, trying to keep control of my emotions. I’m annoyed at Gina for coming here, but I’m more annoyed at myself for hoping she might have changed. Did I really think she would come here wanting a relationship with me?

Yeah, I guess I did. I should have known better.

“I’m fine.”

When I still don’t look at him, he places a finger under my chin and gently raises my head. My eyes automatically come to his.

“That fucker hurt you?”

I shake my head, even though my back feels bruised. I don’t want to throw petrol onto the fire.

Logan lets out a breath, running his fingers through his dark hair. He has good hair. He’s always had good hair. It’s longer than most of the boys at school wear theirs and it has a slight wave to it. He doesn’t style it but seems to let it lie where it falls. I like this, although I don’t know why.

“What were you thinking?” Logan demands, and I brace for the speech that is most definitely coming (and most definitely deserved). “What the hell possessed you to go out there? Alone.”

I should take the telling off with dignity because I really do deserve it, but I am a Goddard and I can’t stop from bristling at his tone.

“I didn’t know she would have that man with her,” I defend, even though I’m not sure I can defend it.

I have no idea how I can be linked genetically to someone like Gina. Am I doomed to follow in her footsteps? Will drink and drugs one day have a hold on me like they do her?

Logan shakes his head. “You stay away from Gina, babe, she’s bad news.”

She is bad news, but my attention is focused on one thing and one thing only: he called me babe. This does funny things to my stomach. Nice things. Things I want to rinse and repeat over and over. Things that make all my pain, all my hurt at Gina dissipate.

“I will,” I agree readily, because I intend to.

He stares at me for a moment, then, without warning, pulls me against his chest, his arms going around me.

Safe in his embrace, I begin to tremble as the reality of the situation settles over me. Anything could have happened if Logan hadn’t been there. Anything. I don’t even want to think about how bad things could have got. Gina will never be the mother I want or need, and it’s time I accept that—even if it guts me.

“It’s okay, Beth. You’re okay,” he whispers, his hand running back and forth over my hair.

And pressed against his chest, his arms around me, I believe it. I believe everything he says because with Logan everything is always okay.

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