Page 109 of Snared Rider

“Actually, Jan was more concerned about my health and wellbeing.” This is a lie, but since he does not know that I run with it. In fact, I’m getting annoyed that the main people in my life obviously don’t give two hoots about me. This is what I trade the Club for.

Jesus.

“For God’s sake, Beth, of course I’m concerned about your health and wellbeing! I’m not an ogre.”

“It really doesn’t sound like you’re worried at all,” I snap, then bring my temper under control. “I’m tired; I’m going to get some rest.”

“Please try to understand where I’m coming from.”

“I do understand. I understand perfectly where you’re coming from. You care more about your job than your girlfriend.”

“Christ, you really do have a penchant for melodrama, don’t you? I don’t even know what the bloody hell I’m doing with you half the time anyway. No one is ever going to take me seriously with you on my arm.” He’s muttering to himself and I’m not sure if he meant for me to hear, but I did and Lord do his words hit me hard.

“What the hell does that mean?”

“Oh, come on, sweetheart, you must know what people think when they look at you: the daughter of a criminal. You’re hardly wife material.”

Oh.

Ouch.

Pain lances through my chest that has nothing to do with my injuries. Sticks and stones do break bones, but words score deeper.

I didn’t think Alistair had the ability to wound me; I was wrong. His words shred me.

I’m hardly wife material?

Is he serious?

Has he always felt this way about me? Why did he stay with me if he did?

I should be used to it; years living under the shadow of the Club means I’ve heard worse directed at me, but never by someone who was supposed to love me.

Doubts and insecurities assault me and I squeeze my eyes shut to ward off the aching throb in my body.

“Well,” I say, trying to hold back my tears, “you don’t have to worry about me ever being wife material, Alistair, because as of now I’m not even your girlfriend.”

Before he can respond, I drop the call and the moment the line goes dead I dissolve into heaving sobs.

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