Page 7 of Love and Other Goals

Olivia, my 15-year-old sister, made the dance team at her high school after years of taking lessons at a dance studio. “Good lord, the drama—I can’t handle the drama!” my mom sighs, making me laugh.

We’re wrapping up the conversation when my mom asks with a smile in her voice, “So, have you seen your Aaron boy yet this year?” I’ve shared bits and pieces about Aaron over the years with her, enough for her to know who he is and that my crush hasn’t ever gone away.

“Yeah, we got to chat briefly at the first Arrow meeting on Thursday, but we were both pretty tied up with our groups of friends and didn’t get to talk a whole lot,” I tell her. “He seemed happy to see me, though.”

“Well, of course he was happy to see you, sweetheart. If he has half a brain he’d want to see you every day,” she gushes. I hear a knock and a voice in the background, and then she tells me, “I’ve gotta go, Lana. My next client just arrived a little early.”

“That’s okay. I love you, Mom.”

Later at AOPi, I power up my laptop to get some work done on my UC Davis application. A few minutes later, Teegan barges into the room. “LaLa, a bunch of us are going to a class at the rec. Wanna come with?”

I groan. “Teegs, I’m trying to work on my application! I’m way behind the schedule I made for myself to submit with time to spare before the early admissions deadline. They need to know how serious I am about going there!”

“Look, I know you’re like a dog with a bone when it comes to your goals and dreams and plans, the kind of dog who won’t let go of the bone even when there’s a treat or a car ride or a squirrel running by,” Teegan says with exasperation. “But sometimes chasing the squirrel is the more important thing to do.”

“The squirrel in this case being?” I question.

“Socializing with your sorority sisters and best friend in the universe. Also, a long, healthy lifespan by way of physical exercise.”

She takes the liberty of closing my laptop screen, knowing that I won’t turn her down. “Ugh, fine, give me a second to change.”

The rest of the week passes in a similar blur. Either I forgot how much is crammed into the first weeks of classes—all the extra socializing, impromptu hangouts, Arrow student leaders’ kickoff meetings—or I just never had a deadline to finish something important early in the fall before. We’re heading to the union for our second Arrow meeting Thursday evening, and I’ve made zero progress on my application.

However, tonight’s Arrow meeting is extra special because Amaya is sharing her faith testimony. She’s well-rehearsed and generally self-confident, so I know she’s ready. But I also know she’s a little nervous, even if she won’t admit it. We have a huge group of AOPis sitting in the front two rows to support her.

After the worship songs and announcements, Amaya takes the microphone. She introduces herself and shares about her background growing up in Wichita with a single mom. She never went to church as a child because her mom was always working a second job on weekends. Amaya describes how she struggled to fit in as a young, biracial girl without much supervision, and how she rebelled in high school, hanging out with a crowd her mom didn’t approve of but gave her a place to belong.

Amaya pauses for a moment, then continues the story that I already know so well. One of her friends got arrested at the beginning of her senior year of high school, the same day that a classmate randomly invited her to go to church. Amaya felt like it was a sign, so she went. And kept going back.

After a couple of months of reading the Bible on her own, Amaya realized she believed in God, believed all that she was learning. She details the healing that took place in her relationship with her mom, eventually leading to her mom becoming a Christian as well.

She shares about getting involved in Arrow in college so that she could continue growing in her faith. She concludes, “I spent a lot of years looking in the wrong places for somewhere to belong, when God knew I belonged with him all along.” Amaya doesn’t usually show a lot of emotion in public, but I swear I see a glisten in her eyes as she thanks everyone.

Our AOPi rows erupt in enthusiastic applause, and I give Amaya a short hug as she sits down next to me. “So good! You were amazing, Beef!” I whisper. Growing in my faith alongside Amaya and Teegan has been the greatest part of college. We’ve grown through Bible studies and small groups, but also by working through obstacles together. Like when Amaya’s high school boyfriend broke up with her unexpectedly October of freshman year because she was “too driven.” Or when Teegan’s parents got divorced at the beginning of our sophomore year, or my current anxiety about Dean’s struggles. But facing those challenges together has only deepened our personal faith in addition to our friendship.

After the applause dies down, Kent shares a message about what it means to belong to God and to a community of Christians, just like Amaya introduced. After the last worship song, Bailey takes the stage to give some final reminders, including Arrow’s first big social event of the year taking place on Saturday. I totally forgot about Lake Games being this weekend; I’m tempted to skip it.

After the meeting is over, all the AOPis have planned to go to Amaya’s favorite local donut shop to celebrate with her. We’re enjoying our specialty donuts and discussing the meeting when I feel a text buzz through on my watch.

Aaron

You at the after party? I don’t see you anywhere

I stifle a grin and pull my phone out, discreetly texting under the table.

Sorry, not there. AOPis out celebrating Amaya

Oh yeah. Tell her she did great. Have fun

My heart sighs. One of these days, Aaron and I will have a real conversation. I just hope it’s sooner rather than later.

CHAPTER FIVE

Two days later, Amaya and Teegan are in an AOPi leadership meeting that Amaya just couldn’t schedule for a weekday, so I’m driving solo out to the small lake on the outskirts of Brooklyn. Arrow has always hosted Lake Games on Labor Day weekend with relays, obstacle courses, races, and a cookout (college students are suckers for free food). It’s a good way to get new students involved, and it’s one of the events that student leaders in Arrow never miss.

I almost didn’t come.

I know it would have been frowned upon by the Arrow staff to just choose not to be there, and I never would have dreamed of disappointing them in the past, especially considering all they had done to help me grow in my faith and my leadership throughout college. However, after my summer volunteering with Mom and spending time in D.C., plus the looming self-imposed deadline for my law school application, I’ve been reevaluating my scheduling priorities.

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