Page 177 of Chaos

As she takes a step forward, I welcome her inside. Her sweet scent invades my nostrils as she brushes past me and spins back to face me.

My breath hitches as she places her palms on my chest and adjusts my navy tie.

“You look absolutely stunning, sweetheart.”

When she blushes, I feel my heart start to race.

“I thought this was bad luck? You’re the one who told me that,” I say with a grin, trying to push down the negative shit swirling through my thoughts.

She shakes her head, her eyes narrowing as she pulls back to study me.

“I was sitting in my room, on my own and a wave of nerves hit me. All I wanted was you, Jax.”

I slide my hands down her soft arms and hold my hands over hers on my chest.

It’s like she is so in tune with me and my emotions. She just knows what I’m thinking.

I love her for it.

“Were you worried about me, baby?”

She nods.

“I know you hate being away from me, Jax. It’s the first night in a long time we’ve been apart. I just wanted to check in, make sure everything was okay. And tell you, I love you and I can’t wait to be Mrs. Carter.”

She looks up at me through her lashes and those doubts from a few minutes ago, they start to fade away. She’s here, telling me exactly what I needed to hear.

She claws me back to her, she is my safety.

“I had visions of you running out on me, or not even turning up. That you realized I was no good.” I have to be honest with her.

“You know that isn’t true, right? I’m not going anywhere. In fact, in a few minutes’ time, I’ll legally be yours. No getting rid of me then.”

She pouts at me, and I chuckle.

“Same goes to you, sweetheart.”I stroke the top of her hand and press a kiss to her temple. She wraps her arms around me and hugs me tight.

And, sometimes that is all you need. Men, like anybody else, sometimes just need to be held tight and told that everything will be okay.

There isn’t a cure for a mind that works against you. There is no magic button to press to make the dark thoughts go away.

I’ll have to battle this every day, probably for the rest of my life.

And I will.

I will continue to fight for us.

For me.

For our daughter.

And most of all, for this beautiful soul in front of me.

I will never stop, and with her by my side, I know I can do it.

She is my strength in this life.

My forever.

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