Page 153 of Chaos

But, Anna knows?

“I-I think it is just a rumor. I mean, I don’t know for sure,” she stammers.

“What else aren’t you telling me, Anna? If our friendship has ever meant anything, you need to spill it.” I practically scream into the phone.

Lara’s eyes widen from the living room floor and Maeve stops to watch me.

“Nothing,” she says quietly. “I have to go.”

The click as the line goes dead echoes through me.

“Dare I ask?” Lara looks up at me.

Slumping into the chair, my hands are still shaking as the rage courses through me.

That bitch knew.

“I know where Jax was that night. I wish there was a way to see the camera feeds.” I remember Stacy bragging about big tips one night at the bar she worked at when she wasn’t dancing for Gil.

Lara looks lost in thought. Maeve crawls away to her pile of books and starts digging through for a new one.

“I have an idea.” Lara seems to snap out of her reverie.

“I’m all ears.”

“The boys all talk about this Enzo guy. He has access to everything. I can talk to Niki and have him do the research. What do you think you’ll learn?” Lara leans back, her head tilts with her brows furrowed.

“I want to find out exactly what happened that night. Something hasn’t sat right with me that Jax couldn’t remember anything. When I talked to him, he was saying he wanted to marry me, and sounded completely sober. Definitely not drunk enough to lose track of what he was doing and wake up in a strange bed. If you had just seen how broken up he was?—”

Lara holds up her hand. “I know. I smelled him. Men who are fine with being dogs don’t go a week without a shower.” Her nose wrinkles like she’s remembering. “Let me text my brother.”

SEVENTY-TWO

JAX

As I park my Lambo in the garage, completely repaired with new tinted blue windows to match the metallic paint, I spot Lara’s G-Wagon parked in the front.

It’s nice Sofia and Maeve have her in their lives too. They love her. Lara is a better person than that bitch, Anna.

Lara is just like her brothers, fierce and protective.

Rubbing my temples, I try to relieve some of the tension in my skull. Apparently my first week of therapy is supposed to gently break me in. Well fuck, if that was easing, then I have no idea what I’m in for as this goes on.

I won’t give up though. I made a vow to myself and to Sofia that I refuse to break. I never want to go back to that dark place and put the people I love through that again. I’m one of the lucky ones. I had Sofia to drag me out of the depths of hell. A lot of men, they don’t have that.

It’s drilled into us as kids, you don’t cry. You don’t show weakness. You must be strong. When you fall, you don’t cry, you brush yourself off and do it again. Over and over until you can’t take it anymore.

I never had a mom to help me. I lost my dad. All I had was Kai.

I rub the skin on my throat trying to force myself back to reality.

As the front door closes behind me, I rush into the living room when I hear Maeve’s cries and find Lara bouncing her around on her hip.

“Where is Sofia?”

Her lips purse, and it makes my heart beat erratically.

Did she leave? Did I fuck up?

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