Page 42 of Alarm Fatigue

“Oh my goodness, I am so sorry…wait, Jacob?”

“I knew it was you. Here to dick tease someone else I see.” There, in all of his self-important glory, stands Jacob Gold, looking a bit drunk as apparently is his habit.

Raising my voice more than is necessary, with the hope that someone will be alarmed by my tone and come and help me deal with this man, I fire back, “What did you just say to me?” What in the hell?

Jacob sneers at me, and I ascertain that he is more than a bit unsteady on his feet. I could probably take him, if it came to it. “No, I will not excuse you actually. You know I got fucking arrested for being drunk in public that night because the bitch at the hostess station would not give me my fucking keys? I wonder what nosy bitch told her not to give me my keys?” It is clear by his facial expression and inflection, he is not wondering at all—he guesses, correctly, that it was me.

Keeping my voice raised, I pull my purse off my shoulder, ready to hit him with it if need be. “Listen, I am going to need you to move out of my way.”

“Is that so? Well I think you owe me something for my trouble—” but whatever Jacob Gold thought I owed him was made unclear when a hand on his shoulder spun him around, and very angry-looking Mark Levy was facing him.

“She asked you to get out of her way, so what in the hell do you think you are doing?”

Jacob raises his hands up, “Listen man, I am saving you, so you should be thanking me. This bitch went out on a date with me…” Whatever else he was going to say is cut off when Mark draws back his fist to strike him and Jacob immediately cowers and drops to one knee. I rush forward, without thinking it through, not wanting Mark to hit Jacob, get arrested, be sued, lose his medical license. As Mark’s fist is flying towards my face, I think, neither one of these assholes is worth it. Fortunately for me, Mark is alert enough to draw back his fist in time, but I trip over Jacob with my sandal and fall up against the opposite wall. Within a split second, I spin around from the wall to see Jacob looking confused and Mark’s chest heaving from his adrenaline.

“Rachel, I couldn’t let him insult you like that.”

“Mark, I appreciate that you got him out of my way. I am going to leave now and I do not want you to follow me.” With that I walk out of the bar and just keep walking down the road. It is dark now and I do not want to head back down the bike path alone, so I just keep going down the street until I see a bus stop. I sit down to think for a minute.

While I appreciate that Mark was there to help, why did he have to resort to raising his fist? Is this how he solves problems? My heart is racing and I look down at my hands to see they are both shaking. That whole drama was a bit much. I fish my phone out of my purse. A text message from Mark appears.

Mark: Rachel, I get why you

left please just let me know

you are okay. Please

With barely a moment’s hesitation, I respond.

Me: I’m okay, just need a

minute or two

Mark: Can I please come

talk to you

I sit there for another moment, trying to settle. I see the tell-tale three dots pop up twice, but he is trying to give me space. I close my eyes for a moment. I say a quick prayer, the one for giving thanks after surviving a danger. That seems a bit dramatic to part of me, but the more forgiving and nurturing side of me gets it. This reaction is not so much about today but about all the yesterdays. I text Mark to wait for me as I walk back to the bar.

I find him standing outside, looking miserable. “Hi.” I start, since I was the one who left. “I hope you understand, I had to leave and catch my breath. I am back, so how about we go grab that dinner you were promising me?”

“I would really like that, if you are sure you are okay.”

“I am never sure if I am okay,” I smile sadly, “but that is not your fault or your responsibility. Thanks for rescuing me from that situation by the way. He really likes to use the word bitch for women. He was so drunk I thought I could handle him but I did not want to be a fool and find out the hard way that I was wrong. So thank you.”

“You are welcome, but I am sorry it escalated so much.” Mark looks really shaken so I take a breath and take his hand. “Rachel, you are shaking. I am so sorry.”

“You are too, Mark. Let’s go eat and hopefully we can make it through dinner without any more drama. Besides, I think we need to talk, as I said.”

“Okay. I need you to know I would never hurt you, Rachel, ever.” With that I look at him directly.

“You cannot promise me that, Mark, no one can. But what is life without a little risk now and then?” I try to smile again but I imagine it is more a grimace than anything and so I squeeze his hand for good measure. “Do you think it is too far to walk? I guess we could both use the time to decompress.”

“A walk sounds perfect.” He holds my hand a bit tighter and together, we head down the street.

Chapter 27

When Mark and I arrive at the restaurant, we are seated at an outdoor table, perfect for enjoying the unseasonably cool evening weather. Shortly after we are seated, the waiter appears to take our order. I order a beer and a spaghetti dish, and with that we sit there in an increasingly weighted silence. I get up to go to the hand washing station before the bread basket arrives and Mark silently joins me. After he waits for me, he washes his hands, and says the blessing under his breath. We head back to the table and he hands me the bread basket and the salt, nodding for me to go ahead. I say the blessing and hand him a piece of bread after I toss some salt over it. We chew in silence then, a bit awkwardly, but I suppose many a Jewish couple breaks the ice on a similar subject so I think about commenting on his actions. I could use that beer about now, I realize.

---