Page 113 of Foul Days

“It smells awful.”

“You know how it is, it all depends on your body chemistry. For example, I love the smell of jasmine flowers, but on me, they stink of cat piss.”

“Hmm.”

The varkolaks on both sides of the stairs grew restless again. Their growls rose like a wave.

Asen leaned his hand on his revolver’s handle. Kosara reached inside her bag and grabbed the aspen stake. How long would the two of them last against all these monsters? Not very long, no matter how good a shot Asen was.

At least Kosara could make sure that when she died, she took this ancient abomination with her. She gripped the stake in her fist.

“Aaa—” A scream sounded. Something whizzed past Kosara, making her stagger.

“—aaa—” There was a loud bang. The cauldron for brewing rakia crashed to the ground. It zoomed forwards, screeching against the stones, sparks flying behind it. The upir’s eyes grew wider.

“—aaa—” The cauldron finally came to a halt. Two legs clad in colourful stockings stuck out of it and kicked in the air.

“—aah!” the kitchen spirit concluded. “Will no one help an old lady up?”

The varkolaks rose on their hind legs and growled, but they didn’t attack. Their eyes searched for their master. He was nowhere to be seen. Only the pointy toes of his shoes peeked out from under the cauldron.

Kosara rushed to help the kitchen spirit. The spirit fixed her puffy hair, adjusted her numerous underskirts, and finally, she looked down at the upir.

“Oh, deary me! I’m so sorry!”

“Mfffhhh,” said the upir from under the cauldron.

“I tested the brakes before I left, I swear.” She slammed her fist against the cauldron. “But they stopped working just as I started to descend. They don’t make them like they used to, am I right?”

“Mfffhhhhh!”

“Look, don’t worry, these strong young lads and lassies here”—she waved towards the varkolaks—“will help me move it, alright?”

The varkolaks looked around, as if they weren’t quite sure who she was talking to. One of them whined helplessly.

“Come on!” the kitchen spirit shouted. “A few of you go over on the other side and push, and the rest of us here will pull…”

The spirit threw a quick glance at Kosara, the question clear in her eyes: What are you two still doing here?

“Thank you,” Kosara shaped with her lips. It had been an enormous risk for the kitchen spirit to help her like that, and she suspected no amount of sour cabbage and pickled green tomatoes would ever repay her debt. She grabbed Asen by the arm, and they slipped through the palace gates.

20

Day Nine

Outside, in the dark, the palace had looked stark white, like marble. Kosara knew that was an illusion. It was built of melted bone. Columns of skulls supported arches of ribs, fingers intertwined on the walls, and rows of teeth framed the windows. Some of the bones had belonged to monsters, and here and there, crooked horns and spikes jutted out. Varkolak incisors and upir fangs decorated the ceiling. The chandeliers were delicate yuda wings, covered in dripping wax.

Yet others were human, and they made Kosara’s stomach turn. From the pillar opposite her, the empty eye sockets of a skull stared back at her. It looked so ordinary in between the elongated, deformed heads of the monsters.

Kosara could easily imagine her own skeleton becoming a part of the furniture if she wasn’t careful tonight. She had a small gap between her front teeth, so they’d probably be hidden in a corner. Her hip bones would nicely fill a hole somewhere. Her skull would fit perfectly in the centre of the archway above the entrance, to silently warn all visitors: never cheat the Zmey at cards, especially if you intend to sneak into his palace afterwards.

Her fingertips twitched. She watched as the shadow sickness swallowed them, crawling up her arms, reaching for her neck. Her breathing grew faster.

Kosara shut her eyes and forced herself to inhale and exhale slowly. There was no time for this. She could panic later on, when she’d got her shadow back, and they’d escaped the palace.

“Are you okay?” Asen asked.

Kosara nodded. “Let’s get this over with.”

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