Page 39 of Controlled Burn

“Yeah, it’s really grown.” He looked around. “This is a great place to buy unique gifts.”

Keith had just come off of a 24-hour shift, and they’d gotten a late-night call, so he was pretty tired. He didn’t say so, but I could tell, and we still had a week’s worth of food prep to do.

“I can see that, but I have a ton of stuff to do today. Maybe we can just make a quick trip through and get back home this time. We could come back another weekend when I have time to look around.”

“Sounds good to me.”

We took a quick pass through the non-food booths and then got down to business. We picked up some local grass-fed beef, fresh eggs, and various fruits and veggies. I even got a large jar of local honey. I felt silly walking out to the parking lot empty-handed while he carried the bags, but it was what he said he wanted.

Since his hands were full, I wondered if I should open my car door or not, but he didn’t even pause when we got there, instead walking to the back of the car before looking at me and saying, “Could you grab my keys out of my front pants pocket for me?”

“Sure.” I stepped towards him and held my breath as I stuck my hand in his pocket, being very careful not to touch anything but the keys. My cheeks heated, and I had no doubt he could see how embarrassed I was. I pulled out the keys and then looked up at him to see what he wanted me to do next.

He was standing right by the trunk, so I wasn’t sure exactly what to do, but he sat down all the bags and held out his hand for the keys.

“You could have done that first and got your own keys.”

“I could have, but then I wouldn’t have gotten a chance to see that adorable blush of yours.” He laughed and gave me a little hip bump. That was the first time he’d ever said anything like that at all. I had no idea what to say, so I just handed them over and watched as he unlocked the trunk and then placed the groceries inside.

He closed the lid and then smiled at me. “Some days, I think it would be nice to have one of those key fobs like you have.” He smiled and patted the top of his trunk. “But then I remember, that’s just something else that can break that I can’t fix. Anything on this car needs fixed, I can do it myself.”

We walked back up to the passenger side door, and he unlocked it for me. I slid into the seat, and once again, he reached around me to fasten the seatbelt. Part of me knew it was ridiculous to let him open doors for me and buckle my seat beat, but another part of me kind of liked it. Silly or not, he said it mattered to him, and that made it important. Still, I wasn’t used to someone taking care of me this way, so it was a bit overwhelming.

We decided to do the meal prep at my house again since nothing we had needed to be cooked on the grill, and that would keep us from having to haul everything to his house first and then back to mine. It took us a couple of hours to get everything prepped, cooked, and put away, but by the time he was ready to leave, I had a week’s worth of dinners, and I’d spent the entire day being treated like I mattered. It was different, but nice.

The more time that passed, the more convinced I was the whole Daddy thing was absolutely for me. The things that seemed to come easy for everyone else, like being on time and staying organized, were a chore for me, and most of my life, I’d had to develop strategies and make plans to take care of myself.

Not that my mom wasn’t great, but she was a teacher and a single mother, so after an entire day of dealing with kids, the last thing she wanted was to deal with another one who was struggling at home. Not that she ever said that, but I could tell, so I always tried really hard to figure stuff out on my own. It was nice to have someone who didn’t seem burdened by helping me.

Something I quickly learned about Keith was to be careful what I told him because, I swear, he never stopped touching me the whole day. Not in an inappropriate way, and not that I was complaining. Honestly, I liked it.

I’d meant it when I said I was a tactile person and that I liked being touched. He’d taken me at my word for sure. Anytime he would walk by me in the kitchen while we prepared the meals, he ran his hand down my arm or fixed my glasses when they slipped down. Or he would tuck my curls behind my ears or adjust the way I was holding the knife. It was constant and exactly what I wanted in my everyday life.

When it was time for him to leave, he pulled me into another of his bear hugs. I swear I felt him kiss the top of my head before smiling down at me and telling me to behave until Saturday when we had a movie night planned.

He kept in touch throughout the next week, which was really nice. The other thing that was nice was having such delicious dinners ready to eat because I’d been busy all week preparing for the book sale that was coming up, and as silly as it sounded, those dinners felt like a little hug from Keith each night. I hadn’t talked to my dad all week, so when I got off work on Thursday, I swung by his house to see how his furniture-building project was coming. Plus, I wanted to hear about this date.

To my surprise, when I got there, Keith’s car was in the driveway. I considered driving on by, but I’d told my dad I would come over, and it would seem odd if I didn’t. I took a deep breath and pulled in. I could do this. Keith and I were just hanging out; it wasn’t any big deal.

My dad must have heard me pull in because when I got out of my car, he called out to me, letting me know they were in the backyard. I went through the gate into the yard and was surprised to see my dad and Keith sitting in a pair of Adirondack chairs on his back deck.

“Oh wow, these look great,” I said.

“They’re comfortable, too. Your dad did a fantastic job.” Keith stood and gestured for me to take a seat, but I shook my head. After all of our texting and the time we’d spent together, it was so weird to stand here with my dad and act like we barely knew each other. Our eyes met, and Keith rubbed the back of his neck and cleared his throat before glancing away.

“I can’t stay but a second. But seriously, Dad, how cool is it that you made those? Did you decide what you want to do with the things you make? Are you going to try to sell them?”

“I think I will,” my dad said. “But not these. These two were a learning experience, but I think I’ve got it all down now. And Keith here was telling me if I got a few things made, I could probably set up at the Farmer’s Market on the edge of town.”

I nodded. “Yeah, I’ve heard they have a lot of handmade items.” After being there with Keith, I thought my dad’s stuff would be a perfect fit, but I couldn’t tell him that because that would be weird. Oh yeah, when I was hanging out with your bestie, who just happens to be my pretend Daddy the other day, he took me there.

“That’s what Deloris said, as well,” he said, looking both pleased and a bit bashful.

I stopped thinking about myself and Keith and how awkward this was and really looked at my dad. He looked… happy, which wasn’t normal for him. Not that he normally looked unhappy, either. I would say he just always looked normal. Like my dad. But I could tell just from seeing his expression when he said her name, there was something different going on here.

“Deloris, huh? Was that the woman from your date the other night?”

“It was. I met her a couple of weeks ago at The Spotted Dog. Del is great. She was there with a friend, and we really hit it off.”

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