Page 92 of Hot Summer

Cas felt her heart climb up into her throat, and she tried her best to swallow it down.

“You should’ve told me,” Femi said. He wasn’t chastising her, but she felt the disappointment in his voice anyway. “I wouldn’t’ve told anyone.”

She squeezed him tighter, pressing him to her like he was the only thing tethering her to the ground. It was ridiculous—she’d only known him six weeks—but he had become one of her best friends and she was going to miss him. She was going to miss the way he sang around the villa; the perfect cups of iced coffee he made her, Sienna, and Ada every morning; his ridiculous laughter at the stupidest of jokes; even the damn jumping on the bed.

All at once, Cas felt the wave crash over her.

She was going to miss the routine she’d built in this house. The people she’d built it with.

“I couldn’t,” Cas said. “My contract—I couldn’t.”

“There were ways you could have told me,” Femi said. “I wouldn’t’ve judged you.”

“Oh yeah right, you would have been fine if I told you that I ‘wasn’t really here for love’?”

Femi shook his head. “I’m not an idiot, Cas. I know a lot of people don’t come on here for that. I’m your friend, you could’ve trusted me.” Cas opened her mouth to argue, but Femi shook his head. “And whether you came here for love or not, we both know you found it. No matter what comes next, remember that.”

He stated it so plainly. So baldly. And Cas clung to the words, to the truth of them—what came next was going to be incredibly hard, but at least she was stepping out of this villa with this feeling.

Femi gave her one more deep squeeze and whispered, “We’ll leave you two alone. To say goodbye.”

His words were ominous, especially when coupled with the way Ada still wasn’t quite looking at her. And she knew it then, felt in her bones what was about to happen.

“Bye, Fem,” Cas said. She squeezed his forearms before dropping her hands down by her sides.

Femi smiled at her one last time, his whole expression sad, before walking past her into the grass. Cas looked over her shoulder, and by this point everyone had gone. She appreciated that they were letting her and Ada have this conversation alone. That they were being given one last minute alone.

Cas swallowed hard. “Hey.” Cas almost laughed at herself, the awkwardness in her voice. “Can I— Can we talk?”

Ada nodded silently, her eyes not quite meeting Cas’s, but, instead, trained on something just past her left ear.

“I—” Seeing Ada like this, still completely unable to make eye contact, still folded in on herself, was making Cas a little desperate. She needed Ada to understand.

She needed Ada to forgive her.

“Ada, I am so, so sorry.”

She shifted her weight forward, thinking of taking a step closer to Ada, but decided against it. As much as she wanted to, she wanted Ada to come to her. Wanted Ada to want her in her space again.

Ada nodded in acknowledgment. “I know you are, Cas.”

Okay, that was something.

Not... a lot, granted. But it was something.

And she wanted to tell Ada everything, could feel the whole story there, waiting to be said, but the reminder of Chloe’s threat about her NDA was there, echoing in her ears, strangling her. It had been annoying, not being able to tell anyone else, but it was infuriating, having to walk this line with Ada.

“I can’t tell you everything right now, but I will. I just need you to trust me when I say that my feelings for you have always been genuine.

“I didn’t come on this show expecting to meet anyone like you. I didn’t think that they’d have anyone here who would make sense for me or would make me, like—” She pressed her hand to her chest. How could she describe the way that Ada made her feel? The way Ada made her heart race and her entire body feel like it was vibrating, constantly, with energy?

“I didn’t plan for you. But then that first day you stepped out of the Jeep and...”

Cas shook her head, and Ada finally, finally, met her gaze.

Cas hoped there would be warmth in Ada’s eyes. Understanding. The memory of the two of them arriving at the villa together could not be this one-sided, could not have been the moment that only Cas realized the connection between them.

Instead, her gaze was cold. Hard.

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