Page 56 of All Because I Found You

“That’s still a lot of food for three people.”

“Leftovers the next day.”

“Okay Chinese and pizza on Friday it is then.”

“Yay!” she clapped to herself, which reminded him of Callie.”

“My sister used to do that—clap to herself when she was excited. I called her a dork.”

Raelyn gasped. “It is not dorky.”

“I thought it was, and it also annoyed the hell out of her, which I loved to annoy her. We were five years apart. I still remember when my parents brought her home from the hospital. I looked at her chubby little face, and I fell in love with her.”

He felt Raelyn’s hand tighten on his.

A smile tugged at the edge of his mouth. “Until the third night of screaming. She was a colicky baby. Never slept. Only cried. I had asked my parents if we could return her for a better model.”

Raelyn’s eyes widened, and her mouth dropped open. “You didn’t.”

“Oh I did, and I was serious. That girl had a set of lungs on her that would put a banshee to shame. But eventually, she stopped crying all the time and started laughing at everything. She loved when I would pretend to hurt myself. She’d laugh so hard, and it was so contagious. She became my little buddy. She followed me around even when I didn’t want her to, but one look at that toothless grin, and I was a goner. I could never tell her no. Hated to see her sad.”

Tears pressed at the backs of his eyes, and he tried to hold them at bay, but one slipped down his cheek. Raelyn swiped it away with her finger, then kissed the spot.

“I was her big brother. It was my job to protect her. I took that role very seriously. When she was in kindergarten, she had this kid who was picking on her. I made a point to pick her up and stare the kid down. I taught her how to ride a bike, and when she fell and skimmed her knee, I carried her home and bandaged her leg. When she was eleven and wanted to go see the Jonas Brothers, and Mom and Dad didn’t want to go, so I went. But when she needed me most.” His words broke off and the tears he tried so hard to hold back fell free. “I failed her. She’s dead because of me.”

“No.” Raelyn sat up and poked her finger into his chest. “You did not kill her. And you did not kill your parents. You need to stop blaming yourself. You need to realize that there are just some things in life that happen, and it sucks, but that doesn’t mean it’s your fault. I never really knew your parents or your sister, but I know they would hate this for you.”

It was his fault, though. He was the one who was driving that night. He was the one who choose that route, who didn’t swerve fast enough. “I’ve carried the guilt for so long, I don’t know how not to.” It was engraved into him, and there was no amount of denial that could take it away.

“By letting a little go every day.”

“Do you really think it’s that easy?”

“I don’t know, but I’ll be here with you while we figure it out.”

The word we wasn’t lost on him. Raelyn wasn’t making it his issue. She was taking it on with him as if they were a team and in it together, and somehow that made it all seem a little less grim.

Chapter 19

The sun was still high in the sky, shining down on the house. It was hot, but the humidity had lessened finally.

Ryder went inside, grabbed two beers and met Gene on the porch. He handed him a bottle, and they sat in the two rocking chairs. It was where they held all their business meetings. Completely unconventional, but it suited them just fine. It was the way Dad handled business, too. He always said it kept the employees at ease, though Gene wasn’t an employee. He was a partner.

“Slainte,” Gene said, and they clinked bottles. They each took a swig, and Gene lowered his bottle first. “I know you’ve been avoiding the idea of expanding, but I think it’s time we really give it some thought.”

“I agree.” Ryder couldn’t avoid it any longer. He saw the numbers coming in through the farm stand alone. They’d quadrupled their yearly income in the last decade, and every year the numbers seemed to keep growing higher and higher. They had more contracts with local business for produce and flowers, and the supply could no longer keep up with the demand. Expanding would be smart business. A decision that would lead to more jobs for the community, more locally sourced products for the restaurants, delis, and markets. Expanding would benefit the entire town.

“I’m sorry, did ye just say ye agree wit me?” Gene stuck his finger in his ear and wiggled it.

Ryder smirked at the dramatics. “I think it’s time. I’ve put it off long enough. It’s what Dad would have done.”

“Aye.”

“We have the property behind the barn on Beaver Creek where the old shed is. We can plant crops there. We can plant more crops around the barn itself. We have some corn there now, but there’s definitely room to either add more or add a different crop all together.”

“Heard the wedding went really well.”

“From what I was told, it did. I’m not surprised. Raelyn is a powerhouse.”

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