Page 23 of Honor Code

"Phoenix… be careful up there," she blurted, unable to help herself.

His expression turned tender, and just for a heart-wrenching second, his blue eyes softened. "I will.”

Then he was gone.

CHAPTER 10

This was not good.

Ever since the incident in Basra, Phoenix had steered clear of emotional attachments. He just didn't need the added complication in his life— he was dealing with enough already. But here was Ellie—smart, sassy, but at the same time damaged from a bad experience she hadn't mentioned yet—pressing all the right buttons.

As much as he was drawn to her, he couldn't let himself get close. Not after what happened to his team. That was on him. His decision, his call, his burden to bear. He didn't deserve happiness, not when his choices had cost good men their lives.

The wind howled as he patrolled the deck with Boomer, both having recovered from their rescue mission. It was close to 0600 hours now, but the storm raged on, showing no sign of letting up. The sun was a silver slit over the horizon, as if the clouds were preventing it from rising. In time, it would, and the mayhem of the night would fade into the background. But right now, the squall was still full of fury.

When he'd seen Ellie lying on the platform, clinging to the railing…

Fuck. He'd nearly lost it. She'd looked so scared, but also distressed about Billy, who'd been trying to help her secure the railing. In that moment, his only thought had been to rescue her. Only once she was safe had he and Boomer gone after the missing man.

He hadn't felt that fear since Basra. Since he'd made the call that had gotten his men killed. The guilt hit him like a punch to the gut, stealing his breath. He couldn't go through that again. Couldn't be responsible for more lives lost.

Yet that moment in the med center… Ellie tending to his wound… Her fingers light on his skin… tracing his scar.

Fuck.

Ellie deserved so much better than a man haunted by his past mistakes.

"Hey, Phoenix. Come and check this out." Boomer was calling him from the railing where Billy had fallen off.

He pushed thoughts of Ellie out of his mind.

"What's up?" He slid the mountaineering rope through his hand and joined Boomer on the windswept platform. No more chances. They’d fastened themselves to the rig, the sturdy clips connected to the pylons that jutted out from the structure. The sudden, violent gusts of wind could take even the strongest man by surprise. He knew from experience that when it came down to man versus nature, nature always won.

The rain still pelted down, stinging their faces like a million tiny needles, but it seemed less severe than earlier. Maybe the tropical storm was losing some of its power. He hoped so. It had been one fucking long night. Tension gripped his neck and shoulders, and his arm was throbbing where it had been cut. He'd probably ask the medic to give him a tetanus shot when he got off duty, just in case. What he really wanted was a hot shower and a nap, but then he knew thoughts of Ellie would intrude.

Maybe it was better he kept going until he collapsed from exhaustion. That way, he wouldn't have to think about her pale skin framed by drenched hair, her lips quivering with emotion, her eyes huge and pleading in the harsh light of the med center.

Phoenix, be careful.

Or how much he wanted to kiss her. But he couldn't let himself give in to that desire. He was damaged, a man with blood on his hands, consumed by guilt. Ellie deserved so much more. No matter how much it hurt, he had to keep his distance. For her sake.

Goddamnit.

"Look at this." Boomer pointed to the vertical join of the railing. "Several bolts are missing here. It's like they were intentionally removed."

“What?” Phoenix leaned in closer, squinting through the heavy rain. Sure enough, the bolts that should have been securing the railing were gone, leaving gaping holes in the metal. "There was nothing wrong with this railing last night, and I doubt the storm could have loosened them to the point of falling out completely."

"Agreed," Boomer said, scowling.

"You think it was sabotage?"

"Maybe. Can't be sure, but without those bolts, it was bound to come loose in the storm."

"Shit." Phoenix thought for a moment. He didn't like the direction in which his mind was going. Didn't want to think they had a saboteur—or worse—on board the rig. He turned back to Boomer. "Let's keep this to ourselves for now."

Boomer nodded. "Yeah, it may be nothing. Let's wait until the storm is over and do a thorough evaluation. We should check the other railings too."

“Good idea.” They’d have to do a full risk assessment after the storm had passed, anyway. Finally, they reached the end of their shift, and two fresh security personnel took over. Both newcomers had helped during the night but had managed to get a couple of hours of sleep in the early hours after Billy had been rescued.

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