Page 26 of Honor Code

She charged for the stairs leading to the deck. She was halfway up them when strong arms lifted her off her feet.

"Ellie, stop." Phoenix grabbed her, turned her to face him. Ellie lashed out, desperate to get away, but instead of letting her go, he cradled her against his chest.

She stared up at him, still hyperventilating, her hands fisted in his shirt.

"It's okay," he said, his voice calm and soothing. "Just breathe. It will be okay. You're safe. Nothing's going to happen to you. I promise." He stroked her hair with a tenderness that made her heart ache.

She stopped fighting, focusing instead on his deep voice, his reassuring words, and slowly felt herself begin to relax. Her breathing gradually returned to normal.

"That's it," Phoenix murmured. "Nice slow breaths. I've got you."

She melted into him, allowing his strength to seep into her, chasing away the last vestiges of fear. It felt so natural, so right, to be held in his protective embrace.

Exhaustion hit her then, as it always did after one of her attacks. She slumped against him, weak and trembling, and he guided them down to sit on the metal stairs, keeping an arm securely around her. She leaned her head on his shoulder, savoring his closeness.

"You okay?" Phoenix asked, his breath warm against her hair.

"Yes. Or I will be." She felt embarrassed and vulnerable. "I'm sorry. I just... What you said, it triggered me." She tensed, waiting for him to pull away.

He must think her so silly. Here he was, this tough former SEAL, afraid of nothing, and she was having an anxiety attack because she’d nearly been hit by flying debris in a storm.

It was laughable, if it wasn’t so frightening.

But Phoenix only held her tighter, his hand rubbing soothing circles on her back. "You have nothing to apologize for, Ellie. I'm here for you. I'm not going anywhere."

Tears pricked her eyes at his heartfelt words. She raised her head to look at him and whispered, "Thank you."

Phoenix brushed a strand of hair from her face, his fingers lingering on her cheek. "Don’t worry. I won’t let anything happen to you." His blue eyes blazed into hers.

Ellie nodded, unable to speak past the lump of emotion in her throat. How was it that she barely knew Phoenix, but when she was with him, it felt more real and right than anyone she’d been with before.

Phoenix pressed a tender kiss to her forehead then helped her to her feet. "Come on, let's get you some water and you can tell me what happened to make you react that way. Letting it out will help. I promise I'm a good listener."

Ellie sighed. After her little performance, she supposed she owed him an explanation. Nodding, she let him lead her to the cafeteria. It was practically empty, not being serving time, and they took a table by the window. The rain had stopped, and there was even some blue appearing behind the clouds.

"I had a bad experience," she began, once he'd gotten her a cup of water and she'd taken a sip. How did she tell him about Rafe? About how stupid and naive she'd been? He'd never look at her in the same way again. "It was two years ago, and sometimes I have anxiety attacks."

He sat down beside her. The chairs were close together, their legs almost touching. His closeness was reassuring—it gave her strength.

"Tell me," Phoenix said. "It'll make you feel better."

Would it? She wasn't sure about that.

Oh, hell. What did she have to lose? He'd seen her at her worst, anyway.

"There was this guy," she began.

Phoenix nodded. His face was impassive. He wasn't judging, just listening.

"I met Rafael when I got back from Saudi. He was a biker. A real bad boy." She grimaced at the phrasing, but it was true. "I fell for him, and for a while, everything was great, but then I realized he was into some shady stuff."

Phoenix frowned. "What kind of stuff?"

"Dealing, I think. I wasn't really sure. He rode with an outlaw motorcycle club, or so he told me. I thought he was exaggerating. Turns out he wasn't." She gave a soft snort. "One day, I was at his place when the cops came around. They had a warrant for his arrest. Instead of giving himself up, he took me hostage." She swallowed, aware her voice was trembling but unable to stop it.

Phoenix took her hand across the table. "What happened?"

"He… held a knife to my throat. Threatened to kill me."