Page 25 of His Tesoro

“He knows how to take care of himself,” she said, but our shared anxiety was heavy on the phone. Dimi was the only member of our family who actually loved Mila and me, and I missed him.

“Do you think he’s still abroad?” I asked.

“I assume so. Maybe I could ask the Pakhan?—”

“No,” I cut in. “Don’t do that. He won’t tell you anyway.” Panic cut through me so viscerally I had to sit down on my rollator. I breathed through my dizziness. Our father had never hit Mila, and she didn’t know he’d ever hit me. But now that I was out of the house, I was terrified he would turn his anger on her.

“Okay,” Mila huffed. “I won’t.”

“Just… just be sure to stay out of his way, okay? And if Dimi calls, will you give him my new number and tell him to call me?”

“Of course.”

Mila updated me on her life. Our father was allowing her to leave the house more often now that I wasn’t there. Guilt filled me that she had been trapped in that house because of me, because of the shame my body caused my family in public.

“How’s your pain been?” she asked.

“It’s fine,” I lied. I measured out the flour and baking soda.

“Sofiya.” Mila’s voice was scolding.

“Okay, it’s been kind of bad. But my knees are stronger than on my wedding day. I’m using my rollator around the apartment.”

“You need to get the Don to take you to the doctor. I’m sure there’s better medication or something that will help you. I don’t trust any of the Pakhan’s doctors.”

“Don’t worry about me, Mila. I’m the oldest. It’s my responsibility to protect you.”

Mila made an irritated sound in the back of her throat. “I’ll always worry about you because I love you, Sofiya. I wish… I wish you could let other people love you. You’re so convinced you have to do everything for everyone, but the people who really love you don’t need you to do or be anything for us.”

Tears pricked at my eyes. “I’m not sure that’s a long list of people.”

“I would find that annoying if I didn’t know you actually believed it. You’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen. You’re kind, talented, and you have this energy that draws everyone into your orbit. I think that’s one of the reasons he hid you away. You outshine us all.”

I let out a laugh. “What are you talking about? Our dear father has only ever felt contempt towards me.”

“Maybe,” Mila conceded. “But I think there’s more to his hatred.”

I rested my cheek on the cool marble counter as the two of us sat in silence.

“I miss you,” I finally said.

“Miss you, too.” Mila’s voice was tight, like she was crying, and it made a tear streak down my cheek. My sister hardly ever cried. She used to say I had enough tears for both of us.

“You sound lighter,” she whispered.

I wiped away my tears. “I feel lighter. There’s a whole world outside of the east wing.”

“You can start crossing things off the list.”

I grinned. “Already crossed off the first thing. We flew back to New York on a private jet. It was so cool.”

We continued talking and dreaming about our list until Mila said she had to go. The Pakhan was making her attend some lunch with the Bratva wives. I was afraid he was already thinking of marrying her off. Nothing made me feel as helpless as not being able to protect Mila from every bad thing.

“You better text and call me all the time, Sofiya. I want updates.”

“I promise. You too, okay?”

“Yeah.” I heard a knock on the door at her end. “Shit, Nikolai is here and I haven’t gotten dressed yet. I’ll have to send you a picture of the dress mom is making me wear. It’s hideous.”