Page 47 of 21 Years of Jane

No response. He was still on the phone.

“Ow!” I whined quietly, as the pain shot through to my other side.

I pulled the curtain back and turned myself in the chair. I put my hands on the sides of the tub and began to pull myself out.

Something was terribly wrong and for the first time in my life, I wanted help. And I wanted it more than anything I had ever wanted before.

“Nolan?” I said a little louder.

I heard him laughing on the phone. I managed to pull myself onto the rug on the bathroom floor and I grabbed the magazine he had left on the floor, flinging it as hard as I could through the open door.

“What the hell? Hey, I’ll call you back,” I heard him say as he replaced the receiver.

“Jane?” he asked, making his way back to the bathroom.

I lay my head on the rug and tilted my face toward the door. I saw his sneakers come around the corner. I saw them stop and then I saw them pick up speed as he flew into the bathroom and picked me up in his arms.

“I’m sorry,” I managed to whisper as another shock of pain went through me.

“You’re going to be okay. I’m gonna call the ambulance right now,” he said in a shaky voice.

He laid me down on the living room couch and reached over the coffee table to get his cell phone off of the entertainment center.

My vision was starting to blur as the exquisite pain began to control every last part of me.

“Hello? I need help! My wife, she has kidney problems and leg problems and… I found her on the bathroom floor almost passed out. Please just send someone!” he yelled desperately into the phone.

The operator said something to him. He yelled something back in frustration.

Funny how all things audible are now going away.

Nolan ran from the room and came back with a dress. I knew it was because he didn’t want me to be embarrassed about being naked when the paramedics arrived and because he didn’t want to move me more than he had to.

I saw a blob hovering over me, so I closed my eyes. I knew it was him, but I wasn’t able to see him properly and it scared me.

Vision leaving; check.

My kidneys were obviously in shut-down mode. I remembered reading online that when your kidneys shut down all types of neat things happen. You can’t speak; you lose your vision and hearing.

They were done working and I was starting to lose consciousness.

I felt tears rolling down the sides of my face. It wasn’t because I was scared; it was because I was tired. Tired of fighting, tired of trying to be normal, tired of trying to be everything that I wasn’t.

I closed my eyes and hoped that of all the things in the world that could possibly happen, that I would at least get to see my grandparents when it was all said and done. Hoping that the pain would finally go away.

And hoping that the kids wouldn’t miss me too terribly.

Chapter Fifteen

Nolan

Sunday, June 30th 1:57 AM

I was sitting in the waiting room, a nervous wreck. I had bitten my nails down to nubs while I watched Liam and Stella playing with Legos on the floor.

They were blissfully unaware that their sister was lying in the critical unit, fighting for her life. They kept asking when they would get to see Janey so they could show her what they made.

It was a wonder that they were awake to begin with.