Page 80 of For the Record

He smiled, wide and proud, and stretched his arms out before taking his hand in mine. I pulled him into the path with me while Adam and his siblings walked down to congratulate us at the finish line.

“You ready?” I asked.

He shook his head with a smile. “Let’s go, kiddo.”

I got into a running stance before stopping. “Wait!” I reached my hands down and unclipped my race belt with my dedicated number on it.

Turning to him, I clipped it around his waist. This was his race to finish, not mine. He deserved every bit of credit he could take.

The crowd around us cheered loudly for him as we clasped hands and gave one more quick hug. I knew my mom didn’t deserve to see him for a second, but part of me wished she was here to watch this. To see him glowing under the crowds cheering. To see him smiling brighter than I ever had. He had his bad days, of course, but this? This was my dad. And I had never been prouder of that than right at that moment. If he forgot it all tomorrow, so be it. I would never let this memory slip from my own mind.

“Let’s finish this together.” I smiled as we took off, right toward the other man I loved with all of my heart, who stood at that finish line, clapping away with a single tear in his eye. We ran at a slow enough pace to get to the finish line. Cameras flashed all around us, but all I could think was run to his arms. Hug him, kiss him, be with him. Adam was all I saw in my tunnel vision. Dad could enjoy the attention all he wanted, and believe me, I knew he wanted to. That man loved any excuse to brag, and who could blame him?

Adam wrapped an arm around my waist and lifted me up, wrapping both of my legs around his abdomen and settling them on his hips. I kissed him, long and hard, whispering thank you again and again against his lips.

If I hadn’t already been married to Adam Wells, I would have dropped down on one knee right here.

Currently playing: I Miss You, Blink 182.

***

The last thing I expected on the flight to Vegas was to have Adam sitting next to me. But it was either him or Crew, and Crew was in front of me, asking a random lady if she wanted to play cards with him.

I stole the window seat, partially because of my potential motion sickness but also because I was petty, and it felt like another way to deny Adam something I knew he probably wanted. He wouldn’t tell me he wanted it. He wouldn’t even make a passing comment. But still. I knew it bothered him, and that was enough for petty old me.

As soon as we were allowed to, per the flight attendant’s instructions, I stuck my earbuds in and cued up one of my three road trip playlists. This one was my emotional version. Full of Stevie Wonder and Billy Joel. As opposed to my more upbeat travel playlists that mostly consisted of Dolly Parton and Rusted Root.

Adam’s leg shook beside me, his knee bobbing up and down and his hands shaking. For someone who flew often, he was pretty anxious for a pretty average flight. My initial instinct was to ask him what was wrong, but he was on the top of my irritation list at the moment, and I didn’t want to voice my concern.

Instead, I pulled out a single earbud, handing it to him before switching the song over to “How Are You True” by Cage the Elephant. The darkness in his eyes lightened up as he reached a hand to my phone, searching for a song to answer with. The familiar music filled my ears as I registered his song choice. “I Miss You,” Blink 182. My heart dipped.

Screw him for knowing me so well. For knowing I had such a soft spot for the guys and…dang it, I missed him too. A lot. The last few weeks hadn’t exactly been easy. Not talking to Adam felt like losing a part of myself. It was awful, but I was still upset and confused. I deserved that, didn’t I?

Adam pulled out his earbud, reaching over and yanking mine out too. He whispered low in my ear. “I’m sorry I’m not good with my words.”

That alone made my chest go tight. The skin around it felt almost itchy, like I had this undeniable urge to rub my hand over it. I knew he wasn’t good with words. I had always known. It was what I always said was a part of him I loved so dearly. And somehow, I ended up using that beautiful part of him against him. Damn.

I lost the battle in my head. The war between wanting to stay mad and the not wanting to fault the guy for not being able to find the words in a situation I couldn’t exactly read myself. Looking up at those puppy dog eyes he didn’t even know he had, I knew that battle was bound to be lost any moment.

I sighed and leaned into him, placing my hand over his. “It’s okay, really.”

He looked up at me with hope, and I smiled at him before breaking my own heart. “Maybe we were always supposed to be friends.”

Adam reared back like I had physically hurt him. It was almost enough to make me take it back. But no. One of us had to be strong enough to see this for what it was. And if it had to be me, then that was all right. I would shoulder that burden for the both of us.

His head shook. “That’s not—I don’t—”

“I know.” I gave him the best smile I could form as my hands reached for the earbuds. I put one in his ear and the other back in mine.

Reaching back for my phone, I pulled up the only song I could think of.

“I’ll Be There for You,” by The Rembrandts.

Adam’s head dipped into his hand, covering my view of his face so I couldn’t read him. With nothing left to say or do, I dipped my head to his shoulder and rested on him as the Friends theme song played in our ears. Looking back now, I think that was the exact moment our hearts broke in silence together.

Currently Playing: The Rain Song, Led Zeppelin

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