Page 57 of Of Bone and Ash

“Um, you know that's not happening, right? You can’t go in there alone,” Teos snaps, rushing after me.

“Why not? I did last night,” I mutter and grin when he sucks in a sharp breath.

“You what?!” I look up and watch in amusement as his eye twitches; shock, anger, and something I can't decipher flashing across his face before he snaps. “Serafina! It's too fucking dangerous in there! You could have died,” he snarls, reaching out to grab my arm. I sidestep him, keeping out of his reach as I continue my walk toward the forest edge.

“Whoa. You used my name. I must be in trouble,” I tease, looking over my shoulder at him and winking, making his face turn an odd shade of red. “And why does everyone think I can't handle myself? You should know better than anyone else how deadly I am,” I add, turning away from him as my guilt comes rushing back.

“Of course, I know how deadly you are, Bella. But that doesn't make you indestructible. Demons live in those trees. Girls are dying! You can't just skip in there and look for whatever it is you’re looking for!”

“I’m not concerned,” I say with a shrug, secretly wondering if a Demon truly could kill me. It would be interesting to know. Letting my magic out is something I wouldn't typically do in front of people, but Teos has seen my magic firsthand years ago. Suddenly, a hand wraps around my wrist, tugging me to a stop.

“You may not be concerned. But I am,” he whispers, looking down at me with so much emotion my breath stills in my lungs. “Do you not care for your own life?” he asks, and I swallow hard, not sure how to answer that question. Do I want to die today? No, not really. But does death intrigue me? Yes, it does. Death doesn't scare me the way it does others, and I can’t help but wonder if it would be better if I were gone.

Looking up, I watch as Teos regards me with a shuttered expression and sighs. Knowing he wouldn't understand my thoughts, I choose to ignore his question. So instead, I reach down, slowly wrapping my free hand around Teos' fingers and gently prying them from my wrist.

“Stay here. You can even wait for me if you want. I won't be long,” I add, my voice softer than normal as I try to convince him I’ll be alright. I add a tight smile for extra reassurance, but it feels fake, and I know he sees right through it as his face falls, an odd sort of despair crossing his expression.

“Oh my God. You don’t care if you die,” he rasps, bending over slightly as he presses his hands to his knees, his eyes locked on mine as his breaths start to come in rapid succession.

“What? No! Teos, I didn't say that.” I reassure him, grabbing one of his hands and stepping into his space, my heart racing at how scared he sounds. I need to fix this. I don't like it when he's visibly upset like this. My magic swirls, immediately coming back to me, casting us in shadows, and I try my best to keep the deadly wisps off him. The dark void of my magic has tinges of oily blue, and I know I’m slowly losing control of the Demonic magic I possess.

“You didn't have to,” he gasps, standing straight up and running his free hand through his hair, fisting the soft curls as he shakes his head. “What the actual fuck, Serafina?” his voice cracks as he yanks his hand out of mine, leaving me feeling cold and alone.

I look down at my now empty hand and curl it into a ball, trying not to think about the pain that suddenly bloomed in my chest. I don't like it. This pain. It hurts more than any cut, bruise, or broken bone ever does. I take a deep breath as my body trembles, goosebumps racing down my skin as the pain radiates through me until my fingers and toes feel numb.

“It hurts, doesn't it?” Teos whispers, looking down at me with glassy eyes. “Having someone you love pull away from you. Have them keep you at a distance.” Letting my hand drop, I nod and take a step back, realization hitting me square in the chest with the knowledge that this is what I’ve been doing to him the entire time.

“Yeah. It does,” I whisper, biting the inside of my cheek as I call my magic back to me, the blue color intensifying, scaring me more at having it around Teos. It could—would kill him if he touches it. I try to ignore the pain that somehow grows, moving through me like a physical entity, stealing not only my breath but my ability to see clearly. “I should go,” I croak out; black magic swirls in my palm just as Teos steps forward, startling me, and wraps his hand around mine, magic and all.

“No! Wait!” I scream, trying to yank my hand from his as he grunts in pain and doubles over. “Teos!” I shriek, shaking my hand, trying to dispel the magic hurting him. “Let go! Let go!” I yell in a panic.

“No! Watch, Bella,” he rasps, coughing a little and looking so fucking pale! My mind grows hazy as flashes of Teos’ dead body spiral through me. The way his body dropped on my bed, keeling over, eyes blank, heart silent. His soul in my grasp as I screamed for him to wake up.

“No. No. No!” I rasp, my eyes burning as I stare at where Teos is holding my hand. Finally, I shake his hand off, inhaling at the sight of the black, dead skin on his hand. “Teos?” I gasp, stumbling back several steps as I try to put distance between us.

A monster. I’m a monster.

“Bella, look!” Teos shouts, rushing forward as my magic finally recedes. “Look!” he shouts again when I shake my head, my cheeks wet as I gasp for breath. Oh my god. I think my heart stopped beating. Warm hands circle my waist, tugging me to a stop before I spin, my back pressed to Teos’ stomach as he holds me against him. “Look!” he whispers into my ear, keeping one strong arm banded around my middle as he holds his injured hand out in front of us.

I brace myself to see the mangled black mess my magic did to him and look down, holding my breath and see… nothing.

Wait, nothing? Releasing my breath with a gasp, I reach out and grab his warm hand in mine, flipping it back and forth several times.

No black, dead skin. No wound, not even a mark.

“Holy shit,” I whisper, holding tightly to his perfect hand. “You’re okay?” I question, flipping it back over once more to make sure as Teos chuckles, his chest vibrating behind me as he slowly pulls his hand from my reluctant fingers. Teos turns me in his arms, and I willingly follow, eyes locked on the hand that had just been black.

“Bella,” he whispers, but I can’t bring myself to look up at him. “Bella,” he repeats, chuckling as he grabs my chin between his thumb and forefinger, forcing me to look up into his smiling face. “I should be dead?” he whispers, then arches a brow, waiting for my response.

All I can do is nod. Not only had he touched my Reaper magic while I was overly emotional, but he had come into contact with the oily blue Demonic magic that my father had forced upon me. The magic that I was most scared of hurting him permanently.

“I didn’t die. It only hurt a little, and I healed in under thirty seconds,” he responds as I keep nodding, taking in his golden complexion, which has thankfully been restored from the awful pale color it once was. “You don’t have to push me away because you’re scared. Now, if you don’t want me…” Teos shrugs his broad shoulders, breaking eye contact as he swallows hard. “Then that’s a different story, and I will leave you alone. But if it’s your magic that scares you,” he gestures at me, eyes moving to my hand as he grabs it, lacing our fingers together. My hand looks so small in his, my long fingers resting against the dark tone of his sepia skin and making me shiver at how right everything feels.

“Then you don't have to worry, Bella. I was made for you,” he whispers, dipping his head closer as he slowly moves my hand to rest on his chest, directly over his beating heart. “The only way you can hurt me is by forcing me away from you.”

My eyes snap up to meet his, looking for anything that might hint that he’s joking, but for once, Teos is staring at me with an air of seriousness I didn't know he possessed. His hand presses against mine, keeping me close to him as we stare at each other. My body warms, my magic fading as I lean slightly into him, letting my chest press against his.

“All right,” I whisper, shocking the hell out of myself and Teos as well if his stunned look is anything to go by.

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