Page 69 of A Spark Of Revenge

“No! No, please don’t!” I cling to him, afraid to be left alone as my teeth start to chatter, my trembling growing stronger.

“Meyer, shhh,” he soothes, his big hands run over my hair, then rub at my shoulders, pressing me to him as I try desperately to calm my breathing. My heart is pounding so hard that my chest aches, and my vision is darkening. “Shit! Mi Sol, look at me,” Valen whispers, his voice calming a fraction as he lowers himself to the bed and pulls me on top of his chest. “Take deep breaths and find something to concentrate on. You're having a panic attack,” he says softly, and I nod.

Yeah, that makes sense, but it's almost impossible to calm myself down. My fingers have gone numb, and my tongue feels swollen. The only thing I can feel is the weird burning at my wrist from whatever that man did to me, but when I look down at my wrist, nothing is there.

“Breathe with me, Mi Sol,” Valen instructs, grabbing my palms and laying them on his chest before he rubs my back again. “Feel me under you and try to breathe when I do.” I nod since that's all I’m capable of and try to concentrate on Valen’s breathing, inhaling when he does, then exhaling. Over and over again until I can feel my body slowly calm down. My shaking turns to soft trembles as Valen's deep, soothing voice brings me back to myself and away from the death and horror of my dreams. “Good, just like that,” he praises, his long fingers trailing up and down my spine over my thin sleep shirt, moving from my shoulder to my side as I peer up at him. “Better?” he asks, a soft smile in place, and I nod.

“Yeah. Thanks,” I rasp, my throat sore from all the screaming I must have done. “You handled that like a pro,” I admit, my cheeks flaming hot as I duck my head to lay on his chest again. “I feel like an idiot.”

“Whatever for?” he asks, and I grimace.

“I just had a panic attack over a nightmare. If Razar finds out about this, he’ll never let me live it down.” Valen chuckles, his hands moving up to my shoulders again before trailing down to my sides, making me shiver in response.

“You had an appropriate reaction over a traumatic event, Mi Sol. There is no shame in that,” he whispers, trying to soothe me.

“Maybe,” I agree and shrug my shoulders. “Thanks for helping me calm down. The breathing thing is what brought me out of it,” I tell him, and Valen nods.

“Yes. That's my favorite technique as well.” I frown at his words and look up at him.

“You have panic attacks?” I ask, and Valen smiles, a raw sort of pain filtering through his eyes.

“Every day since you woke me up. It helps if I can wake up next to you, though. When I wake alone, it's bad… Or when your life is in danger,” he adds, and I stare at him in horror.

Every day? Valen has panic attacks every day?

“I-I didn't know that. You always look so calm and collected,” I mutter in confusion. Valen laughs, his hands moving to my neck, resting there like they always do.

“Listening to my breaths calmed you… feeling your pulse grounds me. I could never feel it in your dreamscape. So if I ever start feeling like I may be lost—which is another cruel trick of my mind—I reach for you,” he whispers, melting my heart and making tears prick in my eyes at his words.

“Valen,” I say, then bring my hand up to cover his on my neck. I’d always wondered why he seemed to gravitate to that area of my body, but now that I know the reason, I’m both elated and nauseous. While I love that I can be his safe place—that he looks for me to ensure he’s okay—I remember all the times he’s touched my neck. Each of those times he thought he might be stuck in the mental and physical prison Aurther Axford created, and I want to storm out of here, find Axford's body, and spit on his rotting corpse. “I want to kill Axford again for you,” I admit, making Valen's soft smile brighten.

“That's honestly the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me,” he whispers sincerely, and I laugh in surprise.

“Murder isn't sweet,” I point out, and Valen nods.

“You want to protect me even though the man who hurt me is dead,” Valen replies and shrugs. “That's pretty romantic.”

“You're rather easy to please if that's what you call romance,” I tease, and Valen grins. His hand lowers from my neck and wraps around my waist, flipping us until he hovers over me, pale eyes bright with excitement. He braces himself on one hand and reaches up, brushing some of my hair away from my face as he studies me.

“I would like that,” he whispers, fingers trailing over my cheek before falling to my lips. “To romance you. I already know I like you, Meyer, but I want to know you. To be a part of your life and help you navigate our world together,” he whispers, and I blink up at him in surprise.

“You do?” I ask dumbly, making him chuckle again.

“Mm hmm,” he whispers, leaning closer to me, our lips tilted close as he keeps running his fingertip over my lips. He lets his weight press into me as he pushes a knee between my thighs, spreading them apart so I can cradle his hips in mine.

“I… I think I would like that,” I admit, making a brilliant smile break over Valen's face.

“Good,” he whispers. “That definitely makes my life easier,” he admits with a wink, charming as always. Pale green eyes meet mine, and I marvel at their soft glow, almost like they’re small stars twinkling in the night sky. “Mi Sol?” he rasps, lowering his body more firmly to mine, my chest pressed firmly to him, his weight a comforting blanket on my still trembling body, grounding me in reality.

“Yes?” I whisper back, sounding so breathy I would be embarrassed if I weren't so turned on right now. But holy shit, Valen’s hard cock is rubbing at my damp panties, and I’m having a hard time forming words right now.

“May I… May I kiss you again?” he asks, almost like he’s worried I’ll say no. Instead of responding, I sit up and take his lips with mine, thrilled at the deep groan and shudder that races through his body at my contact.

“Valen!” I gasp between his lips, my skin pebbling as he curses and draws back.

“Wait… I-I want to romance you… not ravish you on my bed after you had a horrid dream. Your dream, we should probably talk about that… and the scars on your back. Mi Sol, you don't understand the soul-wrenching need to kill whoever or whatever did that to you,” he growls. It makes my eyes widen in surprise, realizing that his fingers had been trailing over the scars on my back while he was trying to calm me down. “You need comfort, not this.”

His voice is hoarse, and he groans loudly, closing his eyes tight when I roll my hips up, grinding into his hard length. I’m trying to distract him from his rambling because there is no way in hell I want to talk about my dream or my scars. What I want… What I need is the man currently kneeling between my spread thighs.

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