Page 41 of Lillian

“Yeah. The judge will hear her case for reunification. Talia could get temporary custody back of Grace. For a trial period, granted she passes all her drug tests and home visits.”

This isn’t happening.

Tears start to build in my eyes, and my throat gets painfully tight. In my mind, there was never anyrealchance of me losing Grace. The life she’s had with me is infinitely better than anything her birth mother could or would give her. Her birth mother who has taken four years to stay sober long enough to be given a hearing for custody. And even that is questionable. There are plenty of ways to pass a drug test. Has nobody watched TV?

It’s not fair. It shouldn’t be able to happen like this.

“Thanks for the heads up,” I manage to choke out, but the pitch in my voice is off, and I’m sure Yasmine can tell. “I gotta go.”

“Okay. Keep your head up. It’s not over yet.”

I nod like she can see it through the phone, but I’m unable to say anything else as I hang up. One tear falls. Then another. I stand there in the yard, staring at the sky and silently sobbing.

Gentle hands rest on my shoulders, and I jump. They turn me to face them, and I see Lincoln staring at me in concern. When he sees the tears, he pulls me into a tight hug, and my arms go around his middle automatically.

“Hey, what’s wrong? What happened?” he whispers as he gently runs one hand over my hair.

It takes a second to be able to speak through the lump in my throat. Even then, it’s more of incoherent ramblings. “I’m…going to…lose her, Lincoln.”

His grip tightens on me. “You won’t. I promise, Lil. We’ll fight for her. Together.”

For some reason, his words do soothe me.Together.

More people fighting in our corner can only help, right? Especially with the money and connections that must come with Lincoln’s family. Maybe my mom is right. I’ve been going along with what my lawyer Peter has said. Believed him and trusted him without much resistance because there was no way in hell a judge would find someone more fit to be Grace’s mom than me.

Not anymore.

Tomorrow, I’ll start looking for a better lawyer. Even if I have to go bankrupt to do it.

After the phone call from Yasmine, I wasn’t in the mood to socialize. Lincoln and I walked back in, said our goodbyes, and I grabbed Grace, and we came home.

In all the excitement of the weekend, we took the rest of the day to relax and simply be together. Grace got to pick a movie for us to watch together when we got home. Much to Lincoln’ssurprise and delight, she pickedShrek. It’s not her all time favorite, but anyDisneymovie is going to keep her attention.

Lincoln’s sitting upright with one arm draped across the back of the couch, I’m snuggled up into his side, and Grace is laying next to me with her head in my lap. Very quickly into the movie as I was gently finger combing her blonde curls, she fell asleep and has been napping ever since. The sleepover last night must have worn her out.

It’s still only early afternoon at this point. WhenShrekwas finished, Lincoln threw on some other movie, but I’m not really watching it.

My eyes are glued to the TV, but all I see is Grace walking into the center on Saturday for her visit and being walked out, right to her birth mom’s car. I see her stuffy sitting in the backseat of my car because she forgot it and never came back for it. I see Grace trapped in a loveless, run-down home, with no nutritious food and no water while her birth mom does drugs in another room.

Every nightmare scenario I can think of filters through my brain like a picture show. It wears on me quickly, and my eyes start to droop.

“Wake up, Lil.” a quiet voice says, and I can feel myself coming to, but I don’t want to open my eyes.

“Mmmnnmm,” I mumble and bury my face into the hard muscle beneath me. The shirt I’m laying on smells like expensive cologne—hints of fragrances I can’t identify.

“It’s getting late, Lil. I have to head back to Phoenix and get ready for work tomorrow.”

That gets me moving. I lift up gently, so as not to wake Grace, but find that she isn’t laying on me anymore.

No, I can hear her playing in her room while I continued to nap on Lincoln.

“She hasn’t been up long. Thirty minutes or so,” he tells me and then grins. “She woke right up, saw you were asleep, and told me to be quiet so you could nap more. That’s a hell of a kid you’ve raised, Lil. You did good.”

His praise for me warms my heart almost as much as hearing him talk about Grace with so much affection already. If there was a part of my mind that thought he’d reject me this time around because I have a kid, that’s quieted.

“You’re leaving?” I ask on a yawn while I try not to let my disappointment show. Obviously, he has to get back to Phoenix. That’s where he lives. It’s where he works. He can’t hole up here with me on a little make-up sexcation.

“Yeah, I have a few things to take care of. But I can come back. Or you and Grace can come stay with me. I have plenty of room. Maybe we switch off weekends?” he says in a low, confident voice.

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