Page 53 of Loved By You

When I met Alex at the age of nineteen, he seemed like my ticket out of my daily hell and so I threw myself into that relationship, and whilst I don't regret it for a single second because I wouldn't have my beautiful girls, I know he was the wrong guy at the right time and I will have to live with those choices I made for the rest of my life. They say the hardest boyto get over is the one you never had, and sadly, I know that to be true.

My trip down memory lane is interrupted by the sound of a car pulling up outside. I fold back my blanket and head for the front door, opening it before Lexi can bang on it and wake Elle.

Lexi is jumping around and running her mouth a mile a minute. Hello, sugar rush. Jack follows behind, looking like a shell of his former self. I watch as he lets out a long breath, rubbing a hand over his face.

Oh shit, was it that bad?

“Mommy, Jack got me candy and slushies and he got me the blue one, Mommy. The blue one,” she cries, speeding past me.

“Lex, Elle is asleep, indoor voices please, sweetie,” I say quietly, knowing damn well she didn't hear any of that.

I turn to face Jack, who slowly walks up the porch steps, stopping at the top step and looks at me deadpan. I stifle a laugh. “Jack, I’m so sorry. It completely slipped my mind”

He doesn't move, still staring at me dead in the eyes. I don't know if he's going to cry, laugh, or strangle me to death right here on my front porch.

“I’m gonna need some sort of therapy to get over that, Ri. I feel violated,” he mutters, still staring at me. I don’t even think he’s blinked.

I cover my mouth with my hands and laugh. “Come in and tell me all about it. Do you want a coffee?”

“No, I want a whiskey… neat,” he replies, walking past me and heading for the kitchen.

I follow him in and peek my head round the door of the front room, checking on Lexi. She's bouncing on the couch, watching the Disney Channel.

“Lexi,” I whisper. “Sit down.”

“Okay, Mommy,” she whispers back and sits. I walk into the kitchen to the sound of running water.

I thought he wanted whiskey?

Jack is bent over the kitchen sink at an awkward angle with his face under the faucet, and from the look of it, rinsing his eyes out.

What the hell is he doing? Was it that traumatic?

I tiptoe over to my kitchen stools and sit down, leaning my chin on my hands to watch him. He stays like that for what feels like minutes, rubbing his eyes, lifting his head up to blink and then going back under the faucet.

“What are you doing?” I ask, narrowing my eyes.

He turns off the faucet and reaches for the paper towels and pats his eye. “I'm getting all the glitter out of my eye that Lexi threw at me. I’m surprised we made it home in one piece. I haven't been able to see a solid shape out of my left eye for nearly two hours. Who the heck gives little kids glitter to throw around?” he says so quickly, I almost miss it.

I don't speak, sensing he's about to offload his ordeal and the least I can do is listen.

“And that's just the tip of the iceberg. First, we arrive and I'm the only one with a dick in the room. The women in there looked like they hadn't seen a male with a pulse in years,” he says, pointing to himself.

He starts pacing up and down, waving his hands about in a theatrical manner. I've never seen him like this, but it's the funniest thing I've ever witnessed.

“And let me tell you, Ri, I’ve seen some things in my life. I've fought on the front line, and those women were scarier than any enemy I've encountered.” He stares at me, not blinking as if he is reliving it in his head. I have to clamp my lips together to stop a laugh escaping.

"Also, can we talk about Margot for a second? Her face. It never moved. No wrinkles, no lines, no emotion. I was terrified.And then she kept trying to grab me, which I hated. Consent, Margot, it's a real thing!"

I can feel myself visibly shaking as I try my best to suppress my laughter.

“Oh, and Daphne! What the fuck’s her issue? She looked at me like she hadn’t eaten in weeks and has been living nil by mouth… licked her lips and everything.” Visibly shivering, he looks like he’s been shook to his very core.

Oh God, I really did send him into the lion’s den.

“Then, as if that wasn't terrifying enough, Miss Susan comes in to announce I need to partake in the class and gives me a plastic crown. I wasn't gonna let Lexi be the only one without a parent, so I did what any self-respecting man would do; I put that crown on my head, flexed my toes and danced.” He’s spiraling now. I can tell by the way his face is flushed, and he's panting.

And it's with that line my laughter fades and my heart melts. Knowing he did all this for Lexi, just so she wouldn't feel left out, makes me want to cry with happiness. No one has ever shown up for her like that.

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