Page 37 of Repluse

I look between each of them as I reach for the bottle of water with my bad hand and attempt to unscrew it with my good. Sam leans across the bench, takes it from me, unscrews the lid, and hands it back. I take a sip. I’m not thirsty. I just sip the water because…

“And all this time, I’ve been living in an alternative reality. My perception of the truth is…” I can’t think of the right words. “This is so fucking fucked up,” I say while letting out a long breath. “Right, I’m sitting comfortably. Tell me everything.” I make my voice loud, strong, authoritative, even though that is very muchnotwhat I’m feeling.

CHAPTER 11

Mila

“Before I tell you everything, can you please explain exactly how you got a broken wrist and those bruises?” Frankie asks.

I look over to Sam. “Have you not told him?’

“He’s told me nothing,” Frankie interjects. “I’ve not exactly been his favourite person since I disclosed everything after you left on Sunday.”

“My hero!” I declare and hold up my good palm for a high five. Sam returns my favour from earlier and doesn’t leave me hanging, delivering with his customary wink.

“Fuck me, you two make me wanna vomit.”

“Why? Because our relationship isn’t based on lies and subterfuge?” I hit back.

“Oh, so, it’s a relationship now, is it? You’ve known him, what, six fucking days?”

“It’s…” I trail off, as I still haven’t had time to consider what passed between us earlier.

“It’s something. We need some time to work things out,” Sam adds, saving me having to explain.

“Why did neither of you answer my calls?” I take the conversation off on another tangent and, once again, voice the question as soon as it hits my brain.

“That’s kinda my fault,” Sam admits.

“Not really,” Frankie jumps in. “Look, this is all on me. I should’ve been up front and honest with both of you last weekend. I wasn’t. As soon as you left on Sunday, I told Sammie everything. To say he cracked the shits would be an understatement. We’ve been mates a long time and have never blued like that.” He pauses, lets out a long breath, swigs from his bottle, then continues. “After grabbing me by the throat and shaking me around a bit, he warned me either I told you the truth or he would.”

I wink at Sam, he winks back. Frankie shakes his head while making a gagging sound.

“I wanted to tell you in person, not over the phone. I asked Sam not to speak to you till I could. When you called Monday, I hadn’t come up with a plan.”

“Or Tuesday?”

“No.Hewas threatening to just drive to Yira and tell you everything.” He gestures with his chin to Sam. “It’s been a shit show, Mils. I’ve felt fucking awful. Lying to you, falling out with him, then you sent those photos this morning, and I couldn’t get out of the meeting I was in fast enough. I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry. But, yeah, just to add to all of this, Logan’s been a member of the club since it started. He came to the opening night.”

Like earlier, his regret leaches out of him, oozing from his pores, but I’m still too hurt to accept any kind of apology. But with Sam backing his story, I am more inclined to believe his sincerity.

Again, I take a moment to process his words.

“That’s… What? That was before we were married, right?”

“Yeah, two years before you were married. Back then he used to come alone.”

The humming returns to my ears. I close my eyes and brace. “Now he doesn’t?”

“No,” the boys say in unison.

“He brings the same person? Or someone different each time? What?”

“The same person,” Sam says.

“It’s Alice, Mils. Alice O’Leary.”

I feel boneless. That’s the only way I can describe it. Like everything inside me has been sucked out. Like I’m skin and organs, but no bone, fat, or muscle. No sinew or tendons. Nothing to hold me up, support me.

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