Page 76 of Heartless

“Sometimes life can be so overwhelming you can’t possibly see how you’ll face another day. But just as surely as this sun sets today, it will rise again tomorrow. The beauty of that is the dawning of a new day brings new strength, resolve, and hope to overcome what seemed impossible yesterday. If you cansurvive the problems today, then tomorrow you will find new resolutions. New peace. New hope.”

The woman nods her head as though her words settle it. And as if her job is done, she turns away from me and begins to walk away again. She leaves me standing there in the middle of the water. I turn to watch her over my shoulder. By the time she reaches the water’s edge, she calls out to me once more.

“Name’s Claire, by the way.”

I inhale a shuddering breath and then slowly expel it. I turn back to the water where the sun has disappeared. A chill runs down my body, and I turn away and slowly make my way back onto the sand.

Was I about to do that? No way in hell I would take my life. It’s a shitstorm right now, but I’m not crazy.

I wiggle my toes in the sand, and though tears pour down my eyes, I can’t help but reflect on Claire’s words.

“...just as surely as this sun sets today, it will rise again tomorrow.... If you can survive the problems today then tomorrow you will find new resolutions.”

Slowly, I put one foot in front of the other and make my way back to the rental house that will be my home for the foreseeable future.

***

The sun is unusually hot today. It’s only the end of August, but the temperature feels closer to the mid-eighties. The air conditioning in the house works perfectly fine, but I’d left out this morning to buy some groceries and toiletries.

I didn’t pack a lot. The house is clean, as the rental agency had it prepared for me, but obviously, there was no food in the house.

When I woke up this morning, I took stock of what I might need to get me through the summer. Shame flooded my face as I considered how I had met the kind, older woman last night.

Had it not been for Claire, I may not have been around this morning to even contemplate what I needed for the rest of the summer. I still don’t think that I was that desperate. Maybe it looked that way to her.

Shaking my head, I place my grocery bags in the trunk of my Lexus.

“Neighbor?” a friendly voice calls.

I turn to see a white man of average height and build approaching me. Nothing spectacular to look at, but attractive enough in his own average way.

“Excuse me?” I say, closing the trunk and pushing the brim of my large, sunflower-adorned straw hat back on my head. I wipe the sweat from my forehead with the back of my forearm.

“You’re the lady who moved into the peach and teal cottage just down the walk from mine.”

Shrugging, I say, “I guess.”

“I’m Matt.”

“Nice to meet you, Matt. I’m...MJ,” I say, taking the hand he extends towards me.

It’s easier to go with my nickname because Meadow is such a unique name that if anyone were to ask around, it would be easy to deduce that the missing wife slash daughter slash friend is me.

“MJ, like the great basketball player...or the singer.”

“Don’t play ball and I can’t sing,” I retort, cutting myself off at just declaring that I can dance if nothing else.

“Well, we’re having a bonfire on the beach tonight. I’d love for you to come down and join us.”

Shaking my head, I say, “Sorry, but I’ve got other plans.”

I walk to the driver’s side of the car, unlock the door, and open it.

“Well, if you change your mind, there will be a group of us down there. We’ll bring the food and drinks. All you’ll need to do is bring yourself. I’ll even throw in a chair for you.”

I give a half-smile that I don’t really feel and hop inside the car.

I didn’t come to Kiawah Island to make friends or to have fun. I only came here to figure out my next step.

---