Page 33 of Reckless Vow

And now, having her in my life, my control is slipping. I need to resolve that quickly.

It’s like where she’s concerned, my entire mind goes into this protective mode. Like she needs a knight in shining armor. Fuck that. I’ve never been that man. So why am I trying to be that for her?

It’s not like she is a damsel in distress… though she looked pretty lost the first night I arrived. Somewhere along the line, someone killed her resilience.

All that strength I used to admire about her. It’s been tamed. Replaced by these loud cries for attention. What happened to her?

And how does an adult lose their phone? Why is she living with her parents? There are so many questions I want to ask her.

But somehow we don’t seem to find words when we are together. Or rather, the past is clouding our judgment. We need to fuck.

I mean,talk. We need to talk.

Fuuuuck.

And when she suggested consummating our farce marriage…

I fist my cock and pump the irritation away. The water beats down on my tight shoulders. I’ve been too tense ever since I set foot in the US.

She looks at me like I wronged her somehow, and then she suggests we fuck. And I considered it for a moment there. Not that I’d take advantage of an inebriated woman.

Our coexistence is charged without the additional sexual tension, and the last thing we need is the awkwardness of the morning after.

The way she stumbled into my arms.

The way she propositioned me.

And then immediately hesitated, despite the loaded energy coursing between us as we stood in the kitchen for God knows how long.

I wanted to bend her over the counter and punish her for taunting me.

For all her sarcasm and scowling. For clubbing and getting drunk. For not telling me where she went, and with whom. Fuck.

I need to kill the thoughts I have about her, or by the time this fake marriage is over I’ll need carpal tunnel surgery.

I grip myself harder and fuck the thoughts of Brook out of my head with my hand. Or that’s what I keep telling myself, but as I paint the glass shower wall with white ribbons, it’s her name that dies on my lips.

While I get dressed, I listen for any signs of her being awake, but it’s only eight o’clock and she’ll probably sleep in after last night.

I choose my tie and pocket square, opting for a light green color. Like her eyes. What the fuck?

I throw the garments back into the drawer and pull out a dark blue tie. That’s better.

There are so many things I still need to adjust for my new life here.

I need to have my things packed and shipped, or go shopping. I came prepared for a week, not a year.

The only way to survive this will be to avoid each other. That’s what we need to do. I can rent an office in the city. It’s not just Brook that tilts my world on its axis. It’s this house as well.

I’m staying in a guest room because I can’t set foot in my old room. But the ghost of the past is still present everywhere.

Yes, I need to find an office space somewhere near the new club location, and then I can spend my time buried in work.

As I walk down to the kitchen, my phone rings.

“Talk to me, Chloe.”

“Have you found the place yet, and when are you coming back?” My business manager dives right into it.