Page 78 of Dark and Dangerous

I’m all skin, no bones—a mess of limbs on the bed, and he stands, his erection tenting his shorts as his eyes take in my naked form for the first time. “So much better than I fucking imagined,” he says, shoving his hands down his boxer shorts. I assume he’s adjusting himself, likehe’s done in the past, but instead, he pulls out his cock, strokes it, and I lick my lips.

“Not today,” he groans, his arm moving rapidly. “But I can’t fucking wait to see your mouth spread around me.” His fingers come down between my legs, his thumb massaging my nub, as his eyes drink in every inch of me. He unloads with a groan, a curse, and I look down at the liquid pleasure he spilled on my stomach. “Sorry sorry sorry,” he says.

“Don’t be,” I breathe out. “That was so fucking hot.”

“Yeah?”

“Jace…”

He swallows, out of breath. “I’ll run you a shower.”

50

Harlow

Jace once described meaningless sex as amazing at the time, and then nothing but emptiness once it was over.

I’d love to say that the heightened level of pleasure lasted forever or that there isn’t any awkwardness in the aftermath, but there is. Therehasto be. The last time I saw Jace prior to tonight, he was yelling at me and physically forcing me out of his car.

As much as I wanted to have this level of intimacy with him, it shouldn’t have happened like this. And it’s clear by the way he sits on the edge of my bed, elbows on his knees, hands clasped together, watching me through the mirror as I brush my hair at my dresser, that he might be thinking the same.

I don’t think it was intentional—doing what we did as a way to avoid reality—but it happened, and now we have to deal with it. I meet his eyes in the mirror, and he looks away, unable to hold my stare. My shoulders deflate, my single, disappointed exhale falling out of me in the form of a sigh. “You don’t have to stay here, Jace.”

“I want to,” he murmurs, but he couldn’t sound less enthusiastic if he tried.

“Don’t you need to go home, check on your grandpa or something?” It comes out harsher than expected, and I hate that it did.

“Harlow…” He sighs.

I lower my gaze, ashamed of my tone, of the way I’m acting. I don’t want to hold this…animositytoward him. I really don’t. I just wish I understood his situation better. I wish I understoodhimbetter.

“Can you come here?” he asks, patting the spot beside him, and when he must notice my hesitation, he adds, “Please.”

I keep my eyes down as I sit beside him, stay that way in the silence while he gathers his words. It feels like an eternity before he speaks. “I owe you an apology.”

“I don’t want?—”

“Just…” he cuts in, turning his entire body toward me. “Let me get this out, okay? I’ve been stewing on it for days, trying to come up with the words.”

I nod, facing him, my defenses falling the moment I see the sadness and regret in his eyes.

“I should not have yelled at you the way I did, and Idefinitelyshouldn’t have put my fucking hands on you.”

“Jace, it’s?—”

“No, Harlow. It’s not acceptable. None of it is, and the fact that you’re even talking to me right now is way more than I deserve. I’m so sorry for the way I treated you when all you’ve done is care about me. I’m not used to it—people caring about me—and I didn’t know how to deal with it at the time, but I need to learn. If I want you in my life, I have to do better.”

“Jace,” I whisper, a sob caught in my throat. I sit sideways on his lap, try to get as close to him as possible. “I’m sorry too. I should’ve listened to you when you told me to stay, but I just… I couldn’t hear what I did and not do anything about it.” I search his eyes for any sign of understanding. “You’ve been ready to throw blows for me twice, and those weren’t even dangerous situations.”

“That’s different.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know, it just is.”

“I need more than that, Jace. I can’t keep on just… skimming the surface with you.”

“I know,” he admits reluctantly, throwing his head back. He eyes the ceiling, murmurs, “What do you want to know?”

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