Page 37 of Match Point

‘I was hoping we’d stay friends,’ he says, a pleading glint in his eye.

I clear my throat. ‘What things did you think you’d left here? If you tell me what you’re looking for, I can let you know if I’ve seen them.’

He watches me curiously. ‘You don’t even want to talk to me a little bit, Flora? Come on, we were together three years. I know things ended badly, but…’

He trails off, before giving a weak smile. ‘You’re right. I don’t deserve you being nice to me. I just hoped… I don’t know.’ He takes a deep breath. ‘I guess you haven’t been missing me. I was surprised how quickly you moved on. Did you meet Kieran O’Sullivan after I left or did you know him before?’

I narrow my eyes at him. ‘Excuse me?’

‘It seems that he’s moved in with you very quickly and I know you, Flora,’ he says, fixing me with an intense stare. ‘I know you wouldn’t let yourself get caught up in a whirlwind romance. You’re too smart for that. So I figured you’ve known this guy for longer than six months. When Zoe told me that she’d seen Kieran O’Sullivan going into our flat, I didn’t believe her but then I saw the stuff online and I realised—’

‘You’re still in touch with Zoe?’ I ask quietly, my blood turning cold.

‘Yeah,’ he says, the corners of his lips twitching up. ‘We’ve always been friends. You know that.’

I desperately blink back tears, caught out by how much that stings. I am not attracted to this man anymore – I know that. But his betrayal and its consequent humiliation still has the power to make me feel like an absolute fool. I have managed to persuade myself that he and Zoe would never speak again after what they did to me. How naïve. And now here I am standing in front of him months later, unwittingly duped all over again.

‘Zoe and I, it’s not serious,’ he assures me, his eyes brightening, feeding off the fact that I’ve shown I care. ‘Nothing like what we had together. And I don’t know what’s going on between you and Kieran O’Sullivan, but if ever—’

‘It’s really none of your business, Jonah,’ I croak, feeling like someone has gripped my gut and twisted it sharply. ‘Did you come here to get your stuff or quiz me on my life? Because you gave up all your rights to know anything about me when you shagged our next-door neighbour.’

He winces, his gaze dropping to the floor.

‘I know I have no right to check on you,’ he admits gently, looking genuinely pained. He’s a fucking good actor. ‘But I can’t help it. I still care about you.’

‘Jonah—’

He takes a step forwards and I instinctively stumble back.

‘I know that I’m the dickhead here,’ he states, his brow creased with determination. ‘I don’t deserve your forgiveness. What I did was wrong. But feelings don’t change overnight. When you love someone, they become a part of you. I haven’t shaken you, Flora. I’m not sure I ever will. And if someone is taking advantage of you, I want to know.’

I balk at his suggestion. ‘What are you talking about?’

He raises his eyebrows, as though we both know what he means. ‘Kieran O’Sullivan? Really, Flora. He’s a notorious dickhead and word on the street is he picks up and drops women willy-nilly. You can’t think he’s genuinely serious about you.’

Did he just say ‘willy-nilly’?

Bloody hell, the fact that I ever let this guy inside me makes me feel sick. In fact, I’m glad he said it. It bats away any doubts that might come crawling in with his clever manipulation and reminds me of what I’ve come to realise the last few months: Jonah is not the person I want to be with. I am no longer powerless in his grip.

I straighten, lifting my chin defiantly.

‘You don’t know anything about Kieran O’Sullivan,’ I assert.

‘Maybe,’ he shrugs, his expression softening, ‘but I know you. I know you’re kind and generous and you see the best in people. That blinds you to their agendas.’

‘The way I was blinded to yours?’ I note, quirking my brow.

He sighs impatiently. ‘I’ve apologised, Flora. I’m human. I made a mistake and I’ve held my hands up and admitted it.’

I snort, taking another step back from him. ‘I caught you with her in our bed. It didn’t take much to admit it.’ I run a hand through my hair. ‘Look, we’ve already been through this and I don’t want to do it again. It’s over and we’ve both moved on. Please get your stuff and go. If you tell me what you’re after then I will try to find it for you, but I’m pretty sure nothing of yours is left here.’

His eyes flash with irritation.

‘Fine,’ he snaps. ‘If that’s how you want to play it, then so be it. Guess we’re going to be petty exes after all.’

I roll my eyes. A few months ago, his poor opinion of me would have had me reeling. I would have been desperate to win back his approval, for him to think I’m nothing less than wonderful. But fuck him. I’ve wasted years of my life trying to please him.

‘I’m here for my garlic press,’ he states.

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