Page 57 of Five Days

The gentle waves on shore acted as a soothing rhythm that set me at completely ease. Somewhat vulnerable too, same as I’d been in the shower with Callum the night before.

Rather than pushing, I waited, giving Callum time to work through his thoughts. While I wouldn’t have minded his sharing, I wouldn’t ask for more than I was willing to give in return.

“I fucked up,” he whispered, eyes closing briefly.

My initial thought at his confession was that he’d made a mistake in hiring me and forcing a showdown between me and Landon, but something deeper lay behind his words. A festering guilt I’d gotten a glimpse of before.

“Being an escort means I oftentimes get to play therapist.” I tried for a light tone. “I’m available if you need to get shit off your chest, and since we both signed NDAs, you can be sure I won’t repeat a word.”

He glanced at me, studying my eyes as though seeking my true intentions.

Yeah, I cared, even though I wouldn’t admit to it.

A soft smile curved his lips as though he’d figured me out, not enough to entice that dick-stiffening dent to appear in his smooth cheek, but my chest ached all the same.

Releasing a slow exhale, he turned his attention toward the swells beyond shore again. “Not even Landon is aware of the full extent of my greatest shame, but it’s the driving force behind every choice I’ve made since meeting him.”

The fact Callum shared with me something only his best friend knew hit me hard. Fucking baffled me.

I waited with bated breath, longing to connect with his past trauma that had created my same need to shelter others. Why hadn’t he shared the whole story with Landon? Maybe because he’d always needed to be the strong one and couldn’t allow himself to appear weak?

If that was the case, fuck my life because that meant he felt safe with me. Trusted me, even after I’d told Landon he loved him. I didn’t deserve that kind of forgiveness or a second chance. How could he entrust me with something that important?

“Someone very close to me made terrible decisions when we were kids and ended up in jail,” he finally said, his tone low and full of the grief I’d expected. “I had plenty of opportunities to step in but didn’t. To this day, I regret not doing more or saying something to prevent what had happened.”

My words about sexual assault and how Callum had reacted with what I’d thought had been a heart attack suddenly made a little more sense. Empathy swelled inside me, and I wanted to dive deeper, uproot all of his hurts, and help him find a way to eradicate them from his life.

Still, I wasn’t one to pry, especially about something that had obviously caused him a great deal of emotional pain.

“We can lead others to water, but they’ve got to drink on their own. Whatever went down, it wasn’t your fault.” I offered what I could. “They made their choice and reaped what they sowed.”

“Same as Landon did with you,” Callum mused quietly.

I wasn’t going to touch that with a ten-foot pole. I refused to take on any blame for what Landon’s actions had brought onto himself. From what Callum had told me that first night he’d come to my room, begging me to at least hear Landon out, I expected the messes Landon had gotten himself into hadn’t been pretty.

“That’s another reason for my volunteering,” Callum said, digging his toes into the sand at the edge of our blanket. “For the longest time, I thought I was a bad person, that I couldn’t follow my own instincts. That I wasn’t trustworthy. I believed those three lies for years before I realized I could do better. Be better. It’s originally why I attached myself to Landon, why I’ve come to care for him so deeply. Nurturing him fulfills a part of me left empty from my inaction all those years ago.”

“And you soothe his neediness as well as give his emotions a safe place to land.”

“Yes.” Callum shot me another small smile.

“It’s nice to be on the receiving end sometimes though, isn’t it?” I asked, speaking about the night before and what he’d allowed me to do for him.

Longing flooded Callum’s eyes.

“You let me take care of you,” I reminded him.

“And it was one of the best nights of my life. I’d like to do the same for you. I can’t imagine you get that very often considering your job demands that you place other’s needs above your own.”

Fuck, did he nail that truth with accuracy.

“Getting others off is a kink of mine, so I’m always satisfied, but yeah, I’ll admit I wouldn’t mind being worshiped. Adored. Loved on without having to expend any mental energy.”

“I can do that for you, Zack.”

The offer made me want to crawl toward him on hands and knees, beg him to satisfy me in the ways no one ever had. Make me feel as though I belonged—for real. But these five days weren’t about me and the deepest desires I’d never shared with anyone. How he pulled the truth from me so damn easily, I had no fucking clue.

“You can trust me,” he pushed gently.