Page 3 of Secrets on the Mountain

Small hands push against my chest, my name throaty and breathless on her voice.

"Cane," she says my name again but all I hear is God granting me absolution.

"Stop. Cane, I--"

"Mom!"

A child's voice cuts her off and it only takes Junie half a second to put enough distance between us that no one would guess we were more than casual acquaintances.

"Mom, you gotta come see the horses with me!"

There's a photo on mom's mantle of me as a kid: I'm holding Raine when he was just a baby. I must have been about four when that photo was taken. I see it every time I visit my mom.

Right now, I'm staring at a boy who's talking a mile a minute at a silent June as he runs toward us.

It's like looking at myself if I'd stepped right out of that photo from Mom's mantle.

The way Raine eyes me as he and the kid get closer tells me my brother sees it too.

2

JUNE

My lips still tingle from the kiss and my brain is filled with a low humming noise that's making it difficult for me to focus on what's going on.

"Mom, come see the horses, Raine said I can ride one if you say yes. Can I?"

Donner's words are incoherent jabber as his little hand grabs mine and tugs me in the opposite direction of the man we came to see.

The man that just kissed me like it hasn't been five years since he had me kicked out of his house without an explanation or even the decency to do it himself.

Kissed me like I'd expected he'd do for the rest of our lives.

To say I'm confused is an understatement, but when I turn my eyes from Donner back to Cane, it's clear that if this is a contest to confuse each other-- I win.

"Hey, Donner," Raine flattens a hand over my son's head, halting his insistent tugging on my arm and forcing his attention toward the giant man glowering down at him with his arms crossed over his broad chest. "This is my big brother, Hurricane. Most of us just call him Cane though. Don't let him fool you, he's more afraid of you than you are of him."

Raine's joke is enough to break the spell, causing Cane to take his eyes off Donner momentarily to deepen his scowl on his brother while Raine just laughs and shakes his head.

Donner keeps a loose hold on my hand and watches the two older men with fascination.

"Go home." Cane's voice is deeper than I remember it, and I remember it being deep. Maybe it's just the way he barks the order at his brother without even a hint of the humor reflected in Raine's smile. "Don't you have a pregnant wife waiting for you--"

Cane's words fade as both men glance toward me and away so quickly it's easy to think I imagined it.

"You know where to find me." The smile drops off Raine's face.

"You ok?" Raine asks me so quietly, I have to read his lips.

I never got to meet any of Cane's family. There just hadn't been time to make the introductions before he was injured, and afterward well, by then he'd changed his mind.

The man hovering protectively between me and Cane right now, asking me if I feel safe for him to leave us alone together doesn't fit with the way Cane used to describe his younger brother. It's obvious that Raine's grown up to be a good man.

My heart aches deeper, knowing that this is the only time Donner will ever get to spend with his uncle. That Raine has a wife that will never be my sister-in-law, that he has a baby on the way that will never get to know his older cousin.

With a forced smile, I give the worried man a falsely confident nod. Letting him get home to the life he's so obviously excited about, while the man that once had me convinced he felt that way about me glares in silence the entire time it takes for Raine's truck to disappear down the dirt road.

"What do you want?"

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