Page 38 of On His Terms

“That’s not…” She sighed.

“Go on. Whenever you’re ready.”

“I’ve never felt more humiliated, less connected.”

“You’ve never looked more attractive, with your red bottom and your honest tears. And since you’ve been here, you’ve been the center of my attention.”

Slowly, she nodded, but he didn’t see the dawning of understanding, meaning she was lost somewhere inside her own thoughts.

Alex stood, then extended a hand toward her, helping her up. He drew her toward the couch where he sat with her in his lap.

She curled into him.

“It was a true taste of submission. Not a fun spanking, a little kink.”

Though she tried to nod, the rigid leather around her neck wouldn’t let her.

“I get that.” She swallowed deeply. “At least I think I do. Until now, no one has ever seen me cry.”

He believed that. “I’m honored that you’re not hiding that.”

“I’m freaking trying to, Sir.”

“So honest.”

“I can’t get rid of the sensation of humiliation.”

“So not being able to wipe your eyes is as difficult as the tears themselves, and maybe harder than being spanked?”

“I’m not sure how you know that, but yes.”

He smoothed a lock of her hair back from her forehead. “Your emotion, your struggle, is real. At any rate, it may mean you’re going to have a profound shift, perhaps toward submission, maybe away from it. Or maybe it’s just a cathartic release that you need.”

She remained silent.

“You can embrace the tears or pretend they don’t matter. I assure you they do. You’re not the same person who walked in here.” He studied her as he stroked her cheeks. “And what’s happening right now is important.”

“I’m feeling a little overwhelmed, Sir.”

Immediately he released her bondage. “We’ll end today’s training early.”

“But… I didn’t use a safe word.”

“I’m making the decision on your behalf. On our behalf. Let’s get you dressed, then we’ll talk.”

She nodded.

After unbuckling the collar, he feathered his fingers across her unblemished skin. “You did well.”

Shaking her head, Chelsea finally wiped her face and inhaled deeply. “I feel like a failure.”

“Not at all. You learned a lot, and it would be prudent to take some time to think about whether you’re doing this for yourself or whether you’re doing it simply to hook a man whose attentions you seek. Also ask yourself whether he deserves this kind of sacrifice.”

She brought her chin up. “I know what I’m doing.”

“Do you?” Had he ever met a more stubborn woman?

“It seems as if you’re disappointed in me, Sir.” She swallowed again.

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