Page 18 of One Steamy Pucking Meet Cute

I take my erection in my fist and pump my hand up and down, thoughts of Caroline filling my head. I think of the way her lips were always colder than mine at first but warmed up quickly. I think of the sound she used to make when I’d first slide my fingers against her or how she liked it when I pinned her wrists down on the bed.

Fuck.

I finish quickly, clean myself up in the warm water, and try to sort through the tangle of thoughts that threaten to take hold of me and never let go.

I walked in on the conversation between Peter and Caroline, overheard them, and acted before I stopped to think. My history with Caroline made me want to protect her. It was only after the fact that I realized I could also stand to benefit from this arrangement. And it’s only now that I realize how quickly this could get complicated.

My attraction to Caroline never wavered. Not one bit. I just felt the emotional push she gave me when she found out she was pregnant. It came right around the time of that bullshit scandal with Sophie Gray, too. I was pissed at the world for multiple reasons, and finding out the woman I was hoping to call my own eventually let a guy knock her up was the last thing I wanted to hear.

And now look at us…

I shake my head and shut off the water. I have a bad feeling this won’t be the last time I have to fuck my hand to get her out of my head. But I’ll do whatever it takes to keep Caroline in the realm of fantasy. Losing her once hurt enough. I’m not about to put myself in a position to go through that again.

7

CAROLINE

Walker’s grunts and soft cries wake me. I look at my phone, blinking through bleary eyes as I try to make out the time. Eleven… Only an hour after I laid down to sleep.

I scoot out from the blankets, lift him up, and let him latch on to my breast. I look cautiously toward Jake, then lift up my knees to cover myself a little as I feed him.

Jake’s huge form takes up most of the couch. He’s lying on his back, one hand behind his head and the other dangling to the floor. Even beneath the blankets, I can make out the shape of his long legs and toned muscles.

I drag my eyes away, feeling silly for staring at him, especially as he’s sleeping. Part of me wonders why we can’t just agree to be grown-ups and share a bed. It’s not like we never slept together, after all. It wasn’t even as if we had some big blow-up and angry end to our not-relationship. He just… drifted away once I got pregnant and let him believe it was somebody else’s baby. Go figure.

I bite back frustration. I’m going to tell him. Less than a week. I might even tell him tomorrow. I’m just waiting for the right moment. I’ll apologize profusely when I tell him and explain exactly why I waited. I know he’ll be angry with me, but I know Jake better than anyone. He’ll forgive me, too. I know he will. It’d almost be easier if I thought he’d scream and yell.

But it’s not like I just decided to keep it a secret for shits and giggles. I definitely had my reasons, even if they feel less and less justifiable now that Walker is born and Jake still doesn’t know.

I stroke Walker’s head as he falls asleep, reminding him to fill up so maybe he’ll let me sleep a little longer before waking me up again. He dutifully resumes feeding.

I smile down at him. “You and me, Walker.” I’m whispering so I don’t wake Jake. “That wouldn’t be so bad, would it? You and me against the world?”

Walker closes his eyes and seems to fall back asleep. I run my fingers across the few wispy hairs on his head. “But it wouldn’t be terrible if it wasn’t just us, right?”

I carefully put him back in his fold-out crib, set his small dinosaur lovie on his shoulder, and give him his pacifier. He sleepily accepts it, then lets out one of those tiny baby groans I love so much.

I drift back to sleep with a small smile on my face and a seed of doubt deep in my chest.

It’s an hour later when Walker is stirring and crying again. This time, his cries aren’t soft. He shrieks, and Jake sits up on the couch, knuckling his eyes.

“Is he okay?” Jake asks.

“I think he just needs a new diaper.” I start to pull off the comforter, but Jake gets up, sticking out a hand to stop me.

“I can handle a diaper,” he says. “Get some sleep for a change.”

I hesitate. “You’re sure?”

“I’m sure. And I’m going to cover up that little pecker so he doesn’t piss on me this time. Give me a few days, and I’ll be a pro. I promise.”

I smile and sink back into my pillow. I know he’s doing this so I can sleep, but I feel such a rush of appreciation for him right now that I don’t think I could sleep if I wanted. Instead, I watch the father of my child lift Walker from his crib and go through the steps I taught him yesterday to change his diaper.

Walker cries even harder when Jake picks him up, but Jake seems calm in the chaos.

“Hey, man,” he says softly. “Your mom is trying to sleep. Are you too little to learn manners? Because that’s bad manners. You don’t scream in the middle of the night, okay?”

Walker keeps shrieking–his little fists balled tight as he squirms and kicks.

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