Page 53 of One-Star Romance

She blinked, her expression clouding. “You don’t have to…I appreciate the apology, but I was just doing a job.”

“The connection could help you, don’t you think?”

“What do you mean?”

“When you take your next novel out. It won’t hurt that you had a hand in a bestseller.” She was silent. So after a moment, he went on. “You are working on another novel?”

“You don’t have to pretend that you care. Unless you’re worried that I’ll eviscerate you in it?”

“No,” he said. It had grown dark, the temperature dipping as the sun disappeared. “I just think it would be a shame if you stopped trying.”

She looked at him sharply. They stared at each other for a moment, both shivering. Then she blinked and looked away. “I have a lot going on right now. Though not as much as you, I hear.”

“What?”

“Aren’t congratulations in order? Zuri said not to tell anyone, but I assume you already know.”

The warmth he’d felt earlier in the day began to return, a smile cracking through his sadness. Maybe Rob couldn’t talk about this with Angus or his parents just yet. But somehow he trusted Natalie to keep this secret. “She told you? Why? No offense.”

“She was excited, and I accidentally guessed. It was sweet.” Rob liked imagining calm, level Zuri so thrilled that she was confiding in a near stranger. “She seems like a lovely woman.”

“She is. I can’t believe I get to spend my life with her.”

Natalie looked out into the garden, something like wistfulness on her face.

“And you and Jeff,” he said. “Congratulations to you too.” She whipped her head back toward him. “I didn’t mean to eavesdrop. But I overheard him talking about an apartment. You’re moving in together?”

“Oh. Yes. We are. I guess I should officially tell him that.”

“Big step.”

They stood there, hugging their jackets closer to themselves in the dark as laughter floated out from the house. “So…” Natalie said, elbowing him. Her teeth were chattering. What were they still doing in the yard? They should go back inside, rejoin the warmth of the party. “How did you know that Zuri was the one?” She asked it in an almost jokey tone, like a kid in the schoolyard grilling him about a crush.

But Rob stamped his feet and considered. “Well, beyond loving her and thinking she is smart and beautiful, I trust her. And I don’t mean simply trusting her not to lie to me, though that’s part of it. I trust her judgment.”

The light from the back window illuminated Natalie’s face, her jaw set in concentration. “Seems like a good reason. Jeff has good judgment too.”

“Good.” Rob swallowed. Still, he hadn’t captured the enormity of it, the relief and steadiness he felt. “But it’s also…being with her is easy. When I think about our life together, it makes me calm.”

Natalie closed her eyes and took in a slow, deep breath. Her voice, when she spoke, was so soft Rob could hardly hear it. “When I think about moving in with Jeff, it makes me anxious.” A low wind caught her hair, lifting the wavy strands of it, but she stayed very still, speaking into the darkness almost as if Rob might disappear if she looked at him directly, and she badly didn’t want him to go. “I can’t tell if I’m scared because it’s a big change or because it’s not right. But that’s natural, isn’t it? I mean, you’ve felt that with Zuri at some point or other, haven’t you?”

He looked down, not saying anything.

She took a step back and tossed her head. “Well, maybe you’re a weirdo who got really lucky.”

“Maybe.”

They lapsed into silence. Still, Rob stayed, and eventually, she began to talk again. “I just want to be settled. To have something to show for myself. To go to a party like this one and, when someone asks what’s new, be able to say, ‘Oh, Jeff and I moved in together and now we’re on the hunt for’—I don’t know—‘the perfect coffee table.’ ”

“You’re considering moving in with him so you can have something to talk about at parties?” He shoved his hands in his pockets. “That’s the stupidest reason I’ve ever heard.”

“Okay, screw you,” she said. “I love him! It’s not just about party conversation. It’s also about growing up, being practical, realizing it’s time to stop following my heart and start listening to my head.”

“Please stop. You’re depressing me.”

“Oh my God, you know what I mean.” He gave a small nod, and she sighed. “I just…I think I’m broken.”

“Or maybe you’re trying to want something you don’t because you think you should.”

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