Page 55 of Ruthless Reign

Everything was too tight. Constricting. I couldn’t breathe.

I put my cupped palms under the cool running water in the bathroom sink and splashed my face with it. It dulled the too-tightness in my chest, but I still felt dizzy and nauseous as my heart fluttered unevenly.

Fuck.

I scooped more water, splashing it over my arms and chest, and over the back of my neck so it would run down my back. The cold of it soaked into my skin, making the dark spots at the edges of my vision scurry back into the recesses of my bleak thoughts.

They’re going to be fine.

I brought the next palmful of water to my lips, sipping it to clear the acrid taste of bile from my tongue. Ava Jade was right, the zucchini bread was good on the way down, but it tasted rank as fuck on the way back up.

“Becks?” Ava Jade called hesitantly from the other side of the door.

I shut off the water. “Coming. Just give me a sec.”

When her footsteps retreated, I sank to the floor, reaching over to snatch my phone back from the plush rug where I dropped it beneath the sink.

I read the message again. The one that came in just as Kaleb came into the bedroom Ava Jade set up for me in case I ever came to visit.

Aodhán

Something’s wrong. Leave town now, before tonight. If you don’t, I won’t be able to save you.

Well, I was already out of town. But my guys were headed straight back.

He said he wouldn’t be able to save me. That part made me think that whatever Séamas had planned, I was the target. Was it possible that by staying here, the guys would be safer without needing to protect me? Would Séamas’ plans fall apart when he realized I wasn’t with them or anywhere else in Santa Clarita?

But it was the something’s wrong that echoed in an endless loop in my mind, eating away at every other sobering, soothing thought until I was sure I wouldn’t be able to hold down an ounce of food until they came back whole.

Oh god.

I didn’t say goodbye.

My eyes burned, and I had to grip the edge of the sink to steady myself as I got unsteadily to my feet on the wet floor, rushing out of the bathroom.

I took the stairs two at a time, the burst of adrenaline burning away the last of the dark spots in my vision as I hit the landing and raced to the front door, wrenching it open.

Rook stood there, just beneath the front stoop as it started to rain, smoking a cigarette.

“You’re too late,” he said. “Ghost tried to get them to wait a few more minutes for you, but Hardin’s about as patient as a fucking crackhead on payday.”

I swallowed hard, trying not to cry as my fists clenched.

“They’ll be back,” Rook said with an ease I wished I could feel. He ashed his cigarette and held it out to me. “Looks like you could use this more than me.”

I took it with shaking fingers, inhaling the blended tobacco and pot that was Rook’s signature smoke. He gripped my shoulder, giving it a squeeze as he went back inside.

“I’ll get Ghost.”

“Not yet,” I blurted before I could stop myself. “I need a few more minutes.”

She didn’t need to see me like this. I might be able to get away with it with Rook, but Aves would know something was wrong the instant she looked at me, and I wouldn’t be able to lie to her right now. I’d have to tell her everything, and I wasn’t sure if I was ready to do that. I could barely admit it to myself.

But I knew one thing was certain; I was done protecting Aodhán.

He might’ve saved my life with what he did to the Kents and keeping what he saw from his leader, but that didn’t make any of it okay. He killed an entire pub full of people.

Innocent people.

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